Where's this place again?
by marthafdg
Summary: Three teenage girls find themselves in Middle Earth. So what  you can go to Narnia after opening a closet? They went to M.E. because they opened a bathroom door..
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello there! Before you read any further let me warn you that this is being written merely for fun, so mistakes may appear. I apologize for that in advance.  
**

**Somewhat a self-insert, but not so much as you continue reading.  
**

**Update: I've been rewriting many of the chapters after finding a few minor errors and also because I wasn't completely satisfied with the old ones.  
**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of Tolkien's characters (unfortunately)**

* * *

Chapter 1 – Do Bathrooms have Colds?

It was a Friday afternoon. Marta and Philipa were going to sleep over at Inez' – their best friend - house. The three teenagers, despite considering themselves the best friends one could have, were as different as black and white. In everything. Appearance, musical taste, hobbies,... the list could go on for a long time. Whereas Philipa - with her dirty blond curly hair and blue eyes - was a sucker for anything related to fashion, Inez - with light brown hair and green eyes - could not go a day without her loved 'animes', as she called them. Marta - who just like Inez had light brown hair with matching brown eyes - was a huge fan of books. Not that she spent every minute of her boring life reading them, but whenever she had the free time she would read. However, they all had two things in common: their love for sarcasm.. and boys.

"Dude, what's that noise coming from your bathroom?" Philipa asked Inez looking towards the bathroom door in Inez' bedroom.

"What sound?" Both Marta and Inez asked at the same time. They were on Inez' computer checking some pictures they had taken on the day before.

"I don't know. It sounded like a snee-"

_ATCHUUUM._

"What was that?" They all turned towards the bathroom and it was silent again.

"Inez… I think your bathroom has a cold." Marta told her.

"Shut up! Don't you see that somebody's in there?" Philipa half-whispered.

"Whatev-" Inez put her hands in both Philipa and Marta's mouths in order to shut them up and they leaned on the bathroom's door trying to hear whoever was in there. Silence.

_ATCHUUUM_

The three girls jumped and they would have screamed but since two of them had their mouths overlaid Inez was the only one to succeed.

"Didn't you say that nobody was home?" Philipa took Inez' hand away from her mouth.

"Yeah. My parents are working and my sister is at some friend's house."

"Then if we're here and nobody else is in your house at the moment, then who the hell is in there?" Marta shrieked.

"No idea." Inez shrugged nervously. They exchanged worried looks between each other.

"Well, there's only one way to find out." Philipa put her hand on the door knob but Marta stopped her.

"What are you doing? What if it's a burglar, he can kill you or something. And then after he kills you he kills me." Inez looked at her. "And Inez. There's no way in hell that's going to happen."

"The bathroom has no windows. Besides, I used it a couple of minutes ago. How in the world would a burglar get in? Look, there's no one there."

"She has a point."

"Fine, but if we die I'll kill you. Both of you." Marta told them and received a couple of eye rolls as response.

"Alright, here we go." Philipa turned the door knob and opened the door.

"I can't see anything!"

"I know! Everything's white!"

"I can't open my eyes!"

"Guys… I feel sleepy."

"Uhhmm…"

* * *

**A/N: Awful? Alright? Amazing?.. any feedback? No?.. okay then.  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: chapter updated  
**

**Disclaimer: Everyone besides Marta, Inez and Philipa belong to Tolkien**

Chapter 2 – Holy Sh&%#!

Marta woke up in the middle of a forest.

As she looked around she saw Philipa and Inez lying on the grass unconscious. 

"What the h-"

"Behold! Stranger, who are you and what is your business in these lands?" She turned around and there stood five men pointing bows at her and her friends. _BOWS? THEY'RE POINTING BOWS?_

She shrugged off the fact that the one who had talked looked strangely familiar.

Before she could manage to answer Inez suddenly spoke up.

"DUDE! I'M DREAMING OF HOT GUYS!" Marta's eyes widened but when she looked at the man who had spoken the only emotion shown on his face was plain confusion.

Then, Philipa woke up.

"What happene-"

"Silence! Answer my question!" The same man who had spoken earlier ordered them after composing himself.

When there was no answer from the confused and scared girls all the bows prepared to shoot only awaiting for an order from their master. A light bulb seemed to light up in Marta's head. They all had pointed ears. POINTED EARS.

"OhMyGod. Wait!" Marta screamed and turned around to look at her friends trying to mouth something.

"Whaat?" Philipa mouthed back.

"The guy!" She motioned to the man who had spoken.

Inez nodded as if encouraging her to continue.

"He's Haldir! From lord of the rings!" Marta tried not to make a sound while mouthing.

"Hal what?" Philipa and Inez were extremely confused.

"Haldir." Marta mouthed again.

"What?"

"Haldir." Marta had to make the greatest efforts not to speak out loud. She knew that even the lowest noise would be heard by the men –or should she say elves – who were literally an inch away from killing them.

"AAAH! HALDIR?" Inez half whispered half spoke.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME? ANSWER QUICKLY OR I WILL NOT HESITATE IN KILLING YOU."

"Shit."

"We're screwed."

"We're so sorry. You see, we're from a land far far away and our father, he's…. very sick and the only cure to his illness exists in the forest of Lothlórien. The healer from our homeland told us that it was possible that we would meet a man – sorry, elf – called Haldir and to ask him to take us to the Lady of The Light for she was the only one who could help us." Marta looked at her friends who were looking at her with confused glances and then turned back to Haldir.

"What illness does your father have?" He asked her wearily.

"Well.."

"Cold..." Inez started.

"Feet! He has cold feet." And Philipa finished. Only when she closed her mouth did she realize how stupid that sounded. Thank god the guy probably had no idea that cold feet actually meant 'Great agitation and anxiety caused by the expectation or the realization of danger'.

"I do not believe what you are saying." One of the other elves whispered something in his ear and he nodded. "However, the Lady of Light warned us that perhaps we would meet someone whose behavior was rather.. unusual today and has asked us to bring them to her." He looked at their strange clothing. "I believe I am not mistaken that you are the ones she is waiting for. Follow me." Haldir eyed them wearily and the other elves surrounded them closely.

"What the heck's going on Marta?" Philipa asked Marta when she made sure no one was listening (which was impossible).

"I have no idea."

"Then how did you know who that guy was?" Inez asked.

"Because… he's from Lord of the rings! You would know if you had been paying attention when we watched the movies!"

"What are you talking about? Those movies are not even real."

"I know. At least I thought I knew. I think we somehow got transported here or something. Or maybe we're hallucinating."

"How did that happen?"

"Wait. We were at Inez' house and then her bathroom sneezed and I opened the door and everything was white. Next thing I know I woke up here in this place." The other girls nodded.

After a minute or so of silence Inez spoke up.

"So… this means we're in the Middle of the Earth?"

"Yes, we are in **Middle Earth**." Marta answered stressing the word Middle Earth.

Inez seemed thoughtful for a moment."Oh well. Are there any hot guys?"

Philipa and Marta looked at each other and smacked their foreheads simultaneously.

"What?" Inez asked innocently.

"We got sent to a different world in another dimension and all you can think of is whether there are any hot guys or not. We have more important things to worry about." Philipa exclaimed.

"Oh please, don't tell me you weren't thinking about the same thing." Inez rolled her eyes at her friends.

"You're unbelievable Inez!" Marta said exasperated.

"We're here."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 – It's Benjamin Button's Girlfriend!

Haldir led the three towards the palace of the Lady and Lord of the Light which stood upon the trees. Once they were inside they came face to face with them.

"Is that…?" Philipa murmured to herself.

"No, it can't be."

"Oh but it is… sort of. Now hush."

"But it's Benjamin Button's girlfriend!" Inez insisted.

"Shut. Up."

Galadriel smiled at them.

"Great is the day of your arrival in Lothlórien. You are not the first outsiders we receive today." Celeborn, the Lord of Lothlórien spoke.

"We're not?"

"You are not. A group of eight travelers arrived before you. But I believe you **are** aware of that." Galadriel glanced at Marta while speaking.

"I didn't know that. Did you?" Inez whispered do Philipa.

"Nope. I think she was talking to Marta."

"Indeed. I am also aware that your home is not in Arda. In another world I suppose you could say. Is that true?" Galadriel gave them a reassuring smile.

"Yes. We have no idea how we came to be here. We were at Inez' house and suddenly we blacked out and woke up here."Philipa paused for a second when a thought came to her mind. "Are we dead?" Her tone was alarmed.

"You are most certainly not. The Valar sent you here for a reason, though I do not know which reason for now. They would have not sent three children from another world to Middle Earth during times like these for no reason." They all frowned at the mention that they were CHILDREN. Galadriel smiled, again. "I believe the reason to your arrival here may be related to your knowledge of what is to happen."

"But only Marta knows that. She's the one who is obsessed with Lord of The Rings. Me and Philipa hardly know the story! Why did we come here as well?"

Silence was Inez' answer and when she looked at Philipa she noticed that her eyes were widened and shock was written all over her feautures features. _What the hell?  
_

_Fear not child, for your purpose in this world will be revealed in its time. No matter what happens you must remain true to yourself, never forget who you are._ The voice of Galadriel was in Inez' mind and she realized that was the reason to her friends shocked faces. She was in their minds as well.

"I will speak to Aragorn about your arrival. We will talk about what will become of you but one thing is settled: you will travel with the fellowship once they leave."

"What? But they're going to fight! We don't know how to fight! We'll end up dead!" Marta tried to protest.

"Fret not. You will learn how to master a sword during your stay in Lothlórien. Elanor will now take you to supper."

They started to leave.

"Oh, and girls?" They turned to face her. "Do not let others know what is to happen. Keep in mind that even the tiniest change in future events may be the cause of our fall. Do **not** try to change the course of events."

* * *

**A/N: chapter updated.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – Exploring New Things… and getting Lost

After dinner they were led to the bedroom they would share and even though the sun had yet to set, they felt extremely tired. Apparently time/world-traveling consumes your body's energy.

"Finally we can talk! I was afraid that the elf-queen would get inside my head. Creepy." Philipa shuddered.

"I know right? She told me things about the future!" Inez said.

"What things?"

"Well…no biggie. If we fail we die." She shrugged as if it really was nothing of importance.

"Oh bugger." They stood in silence for a few minutes.

"I'm tired."

"Me too."

"Let's sleep then." Philipa suggested.

"But we haven't met the fellowship yet…" Marta frowned.

"..and your point is? You heard the 'Laady of Light', they'll be here tomorrow and the next day.. and the day afterwards." At her friend's expression Philipa continued."You don't have to meet them tonight. They're not going anywhere so you can see them tomorrow. After we rest."

"You're probably right."

"As always."

They laid down and after saying their good nights much to their surprises they quickly fell asleep.

* * *

When they woke up the sun was already shining outside and after a few yawns and complaints about being thrown into a different world they finally sat up.

"Oh well… let's go out and explore." Philipa said suddenly.

"What if we get lost?" Marta asked feeling unsure, as far as they knew they could go the wrong way and orcs could find them and kill them or worse: torture them.

"We won't. You know this place."

"Actually, I don't."

"Sure you do." Philipa insisted.

"Great… our lives depend on my knowledge of Lothlórien." _which is close to nothing._

"Yep!" Inez exclaimed happily.

"We're so dead." Marta muttered to herself and covered her face with a pillow.

"Come on, I don't want to stay closed in this room all day.. And I want to see the fellowship! Weren't you the one who was ecstatic to meet them?"

"Alright, alright."

They got up to get changed into their own clothes - last night they changed into the night gowns that had been left for them - but they were nowhere to be found. However, in the place where their clothes had been there were three long dresses.

"You've got to be shitting me. I'm so not going to wear that." Marta objected.

"Oh come on it's only a dress.. and they're actually cute." Inez tried to change her mind. Meanwhile Philipa was already grabbing the light blue dress for herself.

"I'm not wearing that thing." Marta insisted.

Ten minutes later..

"Ugh.. I can't believe I'm wearing this." Marta muttered as the three girls were examining themselves on the great mirror that they had in their bedroom.

"Shut up, you know you actually like it. Now let's go." Philipa pointed out the truth and then they finally left their bedroom.

* * *

They had been wandering in the forest for one hour and so far they had crossed their paths with a few elves but they had seen no signs of the fellowship yet.

"I'm hungry." Inez said out of the blue.

"Now that you speak of it, I'm hungry too. We should have had breakfast." Philipa grabbed her stomach frowning.

"I need to pee." Marta blurted out.

"Well, let's go back. They must have bathrooms in this place." Philipa looked at her friends."Right?"

They turned around to go back but they had no idea which way they had come, everything looked the same. Trees, trees and more trees.

"Which way now?"

"No idea. I guess we'll just have to use our instinct."

"Our instinct! Well, I think we should go this away." Inez pointed to their right.

"No, we definitely came that way." Philipa pointed to the left.

"Guys, I think you're both wrong. I have a feeling that we should keep going ahead."Marta said.

"Fine. You're the expert after all."

"Yeah… I just hope you're right."

**20 minutes later…**

"I can't believe this! We've been walking around circles for ages and there are no signs of civilization anywhere." Philipa complained glaring at Marta.

"What? Are you implying that this is my fault? Awesome, just awesome…"

"If you keep bickering then we won't find anything for certain."

"My ladies…" Someone said from behind them.

The girls turned around startled.

"Holy shit!"

"OhMyGod."

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**A/N:I just realized how short these chapters are but I promise that they'll get longer! **

**Update: chapter updated  
**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 – New Meetings

"Wow. You look like a girl." Philipa said bluntly.

The elf that stood in front of them clenched his teeth in order to prevent himself from answering rudely to this remark. He bowed slightly.

"Good morning. My name is Legolas Greenleaf. My friend Aragorn and I have been looking for you everywhere for quite sometime now. He wishes to have a word with you."

Inez and Marta stood in front of him frozen with their mouths opened.

Philipa sighed at the sight of her friends and closed their mouths.

"Alright. I'm Philipa, that girl who is drooling is Inez and the other one is Marta."

"It is a pleasure to meet you." He bowed again. "May I ask what were you doing so far from your chambers?"

"We were exploring the forest but Marta here got us lost."

"It so wasn't my fault. You're the one who wanted to explore."

"Very well. Follow me. I believe I know this land well enough not to get us lost again."

Marta snorted.

As soon as she regained her breath Inez was by his side.

"Is there any law in Middle Earth preventing older guys from dating girls underage?"

She kept asking him questions while Philipa and Marta talked quietly in the back.

"Poor Legolas, he better find her another hot guy or else he's never going to get rid of her."

"I know. I don't know what you guys see in him though. He's such a girl. I mean look at his features. They practically scream to you: I'M A GIRL!"

"Oh come on, don't be mean to the guy. I think he's pretty hot. And you should see him in battle."

"Maybe I'll get a chance to see that. After all we're coming with them right?"

"I guess.."

* * *

"Ah Legolas, you've found them. Thank you." Aragorn approached them when they finally arrived the main hall.

"It was my pleasure. I will leave you to talk now."

"My ladies, I'm Aragorn. The Lady of Light has spoken to me about what happened to you."

"I'm Philipa."

"Inez."

"Marta. So, what exactly did Galadriel tell you?" Aragorn winced at the mention of the Lady of Light without her title.

"Enough. Although she did not say that you were so young."

"Dude, what's with everyone saying that we're young?" Marta asked.

"Yeah, we're 17 for god's sake."

Aragorn smirked as if he had just made a point.

"What did you want to speak with us about anyway?"

"We will talk about it later. You must be hungry."

"Oh right! I almost forgot about that!"

"You almost forgot that you were hungry?"

"Never mind."

* * *

After they had breakfast they went for a walk with Aragorn.

"I have been informed that you have no skills in fighting." He broke the silence."Boromir, Legolas and I will teach you how to fight properly while we're staying in Lothlórien."

"And exactly for how long will we stay here?" Marta asked.

"Perhaps one month but nothing is certain yet."

"Okey-dokey. Can Legolas be my tutor?" Inez asked eagerly.

He eyed her before answering.

"Yes."

"Sweet! Legolaaas, teach me how to fight!" She yelled to no one in particular and then she was off to find the poor elf.

Marta and Philipa exchanged glances before chuckling quietly.

"Does she have a fascination for elves?" He asked them.

"Not exactly."

"Just for this one."

"I see." He scratched the back of his head. "Come, I will introduce you to the rest of the fellowship."

* * *

**A/N: chapter updated.**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 – A new soap Opera

Aragorn cleared his throat to catch the fellowship's attention once they arrived at the hall where they were resting.

Apparently they had already been told about the girls because Boromir glared slightly at them and the hobbits stared with curiosity.

"My friends, I would like to introduce you to Lady Marta and Lady Philipa. They will be traveling with us once we leave Lothlórien."

"Didn't you say there were three of them?" One of the hobbits asked.

"Yes. Lady Inez is currently trying to find our elven companion. I believe she is quite fond of him."

Gimli chuckled a little bit at the thought of Legolas being stalked by a child such as those who stood in front of him.

"If you'd be so kind as to introduce yourselves to the ladies." Aragorn said.

Merry and Pippin walked over to them and managed to give them cheeky smiles.

"Hello, I'm Pippin."

"And I'm Merry, his cousin."

"That grumpy man over there is Boromir, that's Frodo – he's my second cousin – and next to him is Sam. And finally, that's Gimli." Pippin motioned to everyone while speaking.

"Aye." Gimli nodded.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Philipa and Marta both said.

"Boromir." Aragorn called and Boromir looked over at him. "During the next few weeks you will be teaching Lady Philipa how to use a sword."

He didn't seem quite happy about that.

"You want **me** to teach **her** how to fight? They're women for pity sake! Their place is at home with their family, not in a battle field." Boromir complained.

_Oh no he didn't._

"Excuse me? Are you saying that we're inferior to man? Because of our sex? That we don't belong in a battle field? Oh let me tell you, we be-" Philipa started but Marta cut her off.

"Stop it. They just lost Gandalf, give him a rest. Besides, the way of thinking is different here, don't forget that before that's really how it worked. Women stayed at home while men worked." Marta whispered and Philipa calmed down a little bit and straightened herself but she didn't shut up. She raised her head proudly.

"In our home, women have as many rights as every other man. We fight if we want to fight and we work if we want to work. But I suppose here the concept is different. You guys should be more open minded to new things though."

Marta sighed of relief when she saw that her friend didn't make one of her long angry speeches that could take down any person. And yes, that included Boromir.

Aragorn gave one last look at Boromir as if mentally ordering him to teach Philipa or else he would have to wash his dirty clothes or something like that because Boromir's facial expression quickly changed and he got up walking towards Philipa.

"My lady, I apologize for my behavior. It will be my honor to train you how to fight." He looked at the floor while saying that. Aragorn smirked.

"Alright, now that this is settled.. you will start training tomorrow." Aragorn said.

"Tomorrow? But we just got here!" Marta whined.

* * *

"I'm not sure I made the right choice as to make those two train together." Aragorn muttered while looking at Boromir and Philipa setting off for their daily train.

Inez had already left looking for Legolas, who apparently had awoken earlier.

"Well, it's too late now. We'll have to wait until they come back to see if they're missing any parts of their bodies." Marta shrugged jokingly.

"Indeed. We should train as well Lady Marta." She glared at him.

"Don't you dare to call me Lady again."

"'Tis not proper to say your name any other way."

"Oh really? Then from now on I'll call you Lord Aragorn as well. Or do you prefer **King** Aragorn?"

Merry and Pippin looked from one to another as if they were watching the greatest soap opera ever made. They had everything: a sexist man, two angry women, an old-fashioned man, a crazy girl and an elf.

"If you insist, I'll call you Marta from now on. Let's go, you need to train as much as you can before we leave." He said annoyed at the title she gave him. He could already see the trouble these 3 girls would give him.

Marta smiled happily at her victory.

**Meanwhile…**

"Leggyyyyy, where are you?" Inez called while looking for Legolas.

She came upon two elves.

"Excuse me, have you seen Legolas?" They looked at her confusedly and said something in a foreign language.

"What? No speako Englisho? Est-il qui tu parles français? Hablas español?" They seemed as confused when she spoke other languages as when she spoke in the common tongue.

"Oh well.." Inez shrugged and began looking for Legolas again.

"There you aaaare!" She found him sitting on the grass with his eyes closed.

Legolas opened his eyes carefully.

"Lady Inez, I took no notice of the time passing. I apologize."

"No problemo. So, are we training or what?"

"Of course, I will get us some bows. Stay here."

Inez sat in the grass where Legolas previously had been and started humming to herself until he came back.

**20 minutes later…**

When Legolas found Inez again she was lying next to a tree snoring softly.

He shook her carefully trying to wake her up but with no success. Anyone who knew Inez was aware that she took the expression 'sleeping like a rock' to whole new level.

The world could be falling over and she wouldn't even flinch.

"Lady Inez… Lady Inez… Wake up. I need to train you. Wake up…"

"Having some trouble with the her?" Someone asked behind him. Legolas turned around and found Beregon, one of the elves of Lothlórien whom he had met upon his arrival.

"Yes. I must train her the basics of how to fight in a battle during our stay in Lothórien but she has fallen asleep and all of my attempts to wake her up have failed."

"Can I try something?"

"Yes, if you please." Beregon knelt beside Inez and touched her cheek slightly.

"What is her name?" He asked Legolas grinning.

"Inez."

"I believe this will work." Beregorn said and turned to Inez again."Lady Inez, Prince Legolas wishes to speak with you privately in his chambers. " Legolas' eyes widened in shock and Inez' snapped awake as soon as Beregon closed his mouth.

She looked at Legolas first and then at the elf standing next to him smiling. Inez was about to look back at Legolas but when she realized who the other person was she quickly looked back to him.

"You're…You're…"Inez blinked twice pointing at Beregon.

* * *

**A/N: I'm not sure whether it is "est-il qui ..." or "est-il que" so if it's wrong I apologize (:**

**.chapter updated  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N in the end**

Chapter 7 – Meeting Edward Cullen… or Not

"My name is Beregon."

"No! You're...oh my god. You're Robert Pattinson with long hair!"

"Who is that Rohbaert Patensan person you speak of?" Legolas and Beregon looked at her confusedly.

"You! Oh god, I think I'm going crazy… Orlando Bloom and Robert Pattinson in the same dream?" She slapped herself as an attempt to wake up.

"I think we should take her to Aragorn." Legolas said worriedly and the other elf simply nodded.

When Legolas picked her up Inez fainted.

* * *

"So you're saying that I have to know my opponent's next move before he even knows it himself?" Philipa asked Boromir. They had been going through the most basic things in fighting.

"Yes. For example: if I point my sword at your head what do you do?"

"Hum… Scream." He gave her an exasperated look."Oh right! And then run for my life." She smiled at his frustration.

He was about to protest but suddenly Legolas appeared carrying an unconscious Inez and another elf by his side.

"Is this for real? You? Here?" Philipa spoke to the elf standing beside Legolas.

"Excuse me?" He asked confused.

"Don't tell me you don't know what I'm talking about! You're Robert Pattinson! **THE** Robert Pattinson!"

Beregon and Legolas exchanged looks.

"Why do you people keep calling me for that name? My name is Beregon. I have always lived in Caras Galadhon and have never before left the borders of Lothlórien."

Legolas laughed as if he had just remembered a good old joke.

"I think I understand Lady Philipa. In their homeland there is a man called Rohbaert Patensan that looks like you Beregon. Am I correct?" He looked at Philipa and she nodded not quite understanding why there was a replica of 'Edward Cullen' standing before her and then she looked at her passed out friend and grinned at the thought of her encounter with both Legolas and Robert Pattinson/Beregon.

Beregon frowned.

"What happened to her?" Boromir spoke up.

"She was asleep and I could not wake her up. Therefore, Beregon offered himself to help me. When he was finally able to wake her up she looked at both of us and said: 'Ourlandu Belume and Rohbaert Patensan in the same dream?' and she fainted."

Philipa started laughing hysterically receiving weird glances from the men/elves.

"Are you taking her to Aragorn?" Boromir asked still confused about everything that was going on.

"Yes. Although we already know what has happened."

"Yeah you do that." Legolas and Beregon started to leave but Philipa stopped them. "One more thing though… I strongly advise you not to be there when she wakes up." They nodded and walked away.

"Oh dear… this is just getting weirder and weirder.." Philipa muttered and sighed.

"Come on, we have yet to finish our lesson." Boromir straightened himself up and adjusted the sword in his hands preparing himself to start fighting.

* * *

"I still don't understand why we had to stay here practicing. Why couldn't we just train somewhere else like Philipa and Inez?" Marta complained after being thrown to the floor for the 7th time.

"Why don't you want to practice here?" Aragorn asked her and advanced with his sword at her. "Move your feet."

"Because…" she escaped from his attempt to throw her to the floor again."…Here everyone can see how bad of a fighter I am. I mean, I've already heard Gimli laughing at me at least a hundred times."

Aragorn looked sternly at Gimli like: 'Scaring off the new girl are we? If I were you I wouldn't do that. Remember that time when I found you playing with a doll? You don't want anyone knowing about it do you?'

"My apologies lass, but you are quite entertaining to watch." Gimli chuckled and Marta glared at him. Aragorn used her distraction to send her to the floor again.

"He's right you know.." Pippin said with his cute Scottish accent and Merry elbowed him.

"Shut up Pip, you're as bad as she is." They started arguing about whoever was the worst fighter but the theme of conversation quickly changed to food: their favorite thing in the world - that and tobacco.

"Marta!" Aragorn called her when she was more interested in Pippin and Merry's conversation than in their fight."Focus. You cannot afford distractions when you are in the middle of a battle. If you remove your eyes from your adversary for one second he will take advantage of that."

She rolled her eyes expecting him to go on with his speech but he never did. When Marta looked at him Aragorn was no longer in front of her but now he stood next to the people who had just arrived: Legolas, Inez and… _is that Robert Pattinson?_

"What happened?" As he spoke up Inez started waking up and when the elves noticed that they quickly ran to the other side of the field following Philipa's advice… even if they didn't know why they had to do that.

Inez looked at Aragorn and at first she started freaking out but then remembered the occurrences of the previous day and calmed down. She looked around the room and saw Marta a few meters away from her with the most shocked face she had ever seen.

"Marta? What, what's wrong?"

Marta pointed at 'Robert Pattinson'.

Inez looked in the direction and her eyes widened like her friend's did.

"I thought, I thought I was dreaming when I saw him!"

Marta rushed to her friend and helped her up on her feet. As soon as she made sure her friend wasn't going to fall over she took her as far away from the group as she could.

"What the heck is Robert Pattinson doing here?" Marta whispered-yelled to her friend.

"No idea! Wait a second. Legolas said he would get us some bows so I sat on the floor waiting for him but he was taking so long that I fell asleep. When I woke up he was standing in front of me with Robert Pattinson so I did what any normal girl would do in that situation. I fainted." Marta was about to say something but she continued."Oh, and he said that his name was Bergone or something like that. I didn't really catch it…"

"Alright..." Marta was thoughtful for a moment. "Do you think that people from our world also exist in this world? I mean look-a-likes."

"Maybe.."

"Unlikely, but not impossible. Wait, if we think about it everyone here is a look-a-like of people from Earth."

"Right.." Inez nodded not really understanding and then shrugged."Oh well… at least he's hot." Marta shook her head dumbfounded by her friend's behavior.

They walked back to the group.

* * *

"Inez, now that you are finally alright you should go train with Legolas." Aragorn told her once she and Marta joined them.

"Um… can't it be Bregon to teach me?" She asked and Beregon was about to correct his name but Aragorn spoke first.

"I believe you wanted Legolas to teach you?"

"Yes, I did. But I've been thinking an awful lot about it and I will have a lot of time to get to know Legolas while we're on our little journey but since Bregon won't be with us I only get this small amount of time to know him." Nobody understood why that had anything to do with the subject at hand.

"It's Beregon." Beregon said when he saw that no one was going to speak.

Aragorn looked at Marta mentally asking her what in the world her friend meant.

"I'll translate what she said to English. I mean the common language. Or whatever. Inez meant that Legolas is hot but she will have plenty of time to get into his pants while we're on our little journey. Beregon is hot as well – actually I think that she thinks he's hotter than Legolas – but he won't travel with us so she only has this little time to 'get to know him'. Oh I forgot to mention the key to this: she chose them to teach her because they're hot." She explained them.

Apparently this didn't help much because everyone's confused faces just became even more confused -if that was possible. Aside from Inez' of course, who was as red as a tomato and ready to jump on Marta – to kill her that is.

"What does hot mean?""What does get into his pants mean?" Pippin and Merry asked simultaneously.

By now Philipa and Boromir had joined them, since they probably had heard many voices chatting and wanted to find out what was going on.

"I have no idea why you're asking that but Hot means that someone's really hands-" Inez run to shut Philipa's mouth.

"Hot means that someone's a great person! And… get into someone's pants means to eagerly want to learn something from someone." She quickly made up something and oddly enough everyone seemed to accept that explanation.

"Merry, I want to get into your pants."Pippin seriously told Merry and the three girls started laughing like mad people.

* * *

**A/N: I'm not a fan of Twilight or anything but my friend is so.. hum.. there you go. (if you really hate twilight you can just picture Beregon as someone else :D) - as I was rewriting this chapter (well, not rewriting but changing a few things) I considered deleting the part where Beregon supposedly looks like Robert Pattinson but then again, that would take all the fun in this chapter.  
**

**chapter updated.  
**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: This chapter doesn't really add much to the story, it's just a filler.**

Chapter 8 – About Earth and More Soup Operas…

"Tell me Inez, what is your homeland like?" Beregon asked Inez. It had been two weeks since they had first met and ever since they had spent most of the time practicing and walking around together. Thankfully, over those weeks Inez' behavior towards him (and all other somewhat handsome people) changed exponentially. Mainly because everyone in Middle Earth seemed to be handsome and after one week of freaking out every time she saw someone new, it got tiring.

"What do you mean?" She asked while moving around with her own sword.

"Well, you already know many things about Middle Earth but I have no knowledge of your world." They stopped fighting.

"Alright… but I don't really know what exactly you want to know about Earth."

"You can start by telling me about the things you like."

"Okay. It's completely different from Middle Earth. And I really mean it when I say that it's completely different. Nowadays we don't have many green spaces like forests. Most of them were destroyed in order to create new houses. Huge houses, many feet high. We don't travel by horses anymore; we have cars, trains and planes." He gave her a confused look. "I don't know how to explain what they are. All you need to know is that they aren't animals or anything that looks like animals. Cars and trains move because they have wheels and planes are sort of like 'birds' I guess.. because they fly. I mean they are used when you want to travel to somewhere that is too far away to use a car.. I'm just making you more confused.."

"No! Well, yes but.. you seem to be much more advanced than we are."

"We are, but don't you thing that's always a good thing. We've exaggerated. Cars pollute the environment too much and that, along with other things, is causing global warming – which is a bad thing by the way." She frowned.

"Maybe you should just tell me what the good things are." He smiled and Inez chuckled.

"You're probably right." She told him all the good things she could remember about Earth but decided not to speak about her family.

They then started training again forgetting their past subject.

"You're getting better Inez." Aragorn said from behind her and although she was flattered about that comment she ignored it and kept fighting with Beregon. One of the most important things to have in mind while battling was that one couldn't take any distractions.

"Yeah right." Marta snorted. "He's just being nice you know. You're still as bad as you've always been." She smirked.

Just then Inez threw Beregon to the floor and grinned and turned her head to look at Marta.

"You were saying?" Inez asked innocently and Marta simply shrugged indifferent.

Aragorn shook his head and spoke up.

"Anyway, we did not come here to discuss your fighting abilities Inez. The sun is setting and Lady Galadriel has requested us to join her during supper."

"We will just finish up and I will escort Inez to her quarters myself." Beregon said beside Inez.

"Very well." Aragorn looked to his left and Marta was making faces at Inez and sighed. "Marta, come now."

After they left Beregon started cleaning the mess they had made while fighting.

"You do know I let you throw me to the floor because of your friend right?"

"Yep. Thanks for that." She smiled and they walked in silence to her room.

* * *

"Why do we have to be the ones telling everybody that there's going to be a fest tonight?" Marta whined to Aragorn while they were walking towards the site where Philipa and Boromir were training.

"Because." Was Aragorn's only response.

"Getting cranky are we?" Marta elbowed him playfully.

They approached Philipa and Boromir while they were in the middle of an argument – as always.

"How many times do I have to tell you that is not how you grab a sword? You must grab it tightly and not wave it around as if it is the less dangerous thing in the world!"

"Dude, chillax! I know exactly HOW to grab a sword. You have told me a thousand times already so quit lecturing me! It's not my fault that I'm left-handed! Why don't you let me grab the sword with my left hand for god's sake?"

"BECAUSE THAT IS NOT HOW IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE HANDLED!" They ignored the presence of Aragorn and Marta and continued their argument.

"Should we interrupt them?" Marta whispered to Aragorn. He examined both Boromir and Philipa's faces and looked at Marta.

"Not this time." He whispered back and she nodded while they found a seat on the floor and watched the other two fighting.

"Why can't you understand that the only reason I am insisting that you learn how to fight with your right hand is to your own good!" Boromir yelled exasperated.

"I know that! But what I really don't understand is WHY IN THE WORLD I can't defend myself with my left hand! Honestly? Just think for a second. I know it's hard but give it a try." Boromir glared at her. "So, let's suppose that I agree with you and I try to learn how to fight with my right hand. Don't you think that it will be more difficult for me to learn like that? I mean, if I learn how to fight with my left hand it will far more easier and it will save us so much trouble. Am I right?"

Boromir sighed defeated.

"Indeed." He said almost inaudibly.

Philipa made a happy dance and hugged Boromir. "You have to admit it. You kinda like me."

He shook his head and grabbed her sword.

"'Tis enough practice for today. You will begin learning with your left hand tomorrow." She smiled and they turned around facing two amused familiar faces sitting on the floor looking at them.

Philipa's face became angry yet again at the thought of not having any support on the almost lost argument.

"OH! SO YOU WERE HERE AND DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER TO GIVE ME A HAND?" Philipa stormed.

"It wouldn't be nearly as fun…" Marta replied sheepishly and when she saw the look on Philipa's face her eyes widened.

"I think now's the time when we're supposed to run." She whispered to Aragorn and he nodded.

Philipa was about to say something when Aragorn cut her off.

"One thing first. Lady Galadriel wishes us to join her and Lord Celeborn during dinner. It will take place in an hour near the main hall." He said politely as quickly as he could and then grabbed Marta's arm and rushed out of there as fast as he could with an angry Philipa close behind.

Boromir stayed behind walking slowly while talking to himself.

"Oh Valar. If they are Middle Earth's last hope we're doomed."

* * *

**a/n: chapter updated.**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9- No more comfy beds? Oh no.

"I still can't believe you didn't help me out back there Marta." Philipa said while combing her hair. The three girls had already bathed and were finishing getting ready to dinner.

"I've already apologized for that… And you handled it well by yourself anyway."

"Philipa my dear, can't you see that Marta was more interested in a certain other person?" Inez joined the conversation and Marta rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. I'm not the one who spends every second of the day with Mr. Robert Pattinson."

Inez shrugged. "So? I like his company."

"Honey, we both know that there's more than that behind the reason why you're always with him." Philipa grinned.

Just then someone knocked at the door.

"Coming!" Marta yelled and ran to the door.

"Hello Marta, we came to escort you ladies to dinner." Legolas said. Next to him stood Aragorn and Beregon smiling politely.

Marta blinked. They smiled. She blinked again.

"You're here to what?" She asked as her friends joined her at the door. The three men/elves half-bowed at them causing all three to unconsciously blush.

"Oh, you're taking us to dinner? That's so cute!" Inez grinned and grabbed Beregon's arm after throwing her own comb inside the room.

Philipa looked between Aragorn and Legolas. _Sorry Marta, but there's no way in hell I'm going with the elf-dude._

"Aragorn, my friend!" She linked her arm with Aragorn's and they started walking behind Inez and Beregon.

"I believe you will have to take me as your escort." Legolas smiled and extended his arm expecting Marta to do the same.

"Right…" She mumbled and they walked to dinner.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes."

"Do you sleep?"

"Of course. Why would you ask that?"

"Nothing, just curious." She smiled mischievously.

* * *

"Can I ask you something?" Aragorn asked Philipa.

"Sure."

"Why is it that you dislike Legolas so much?"

"I don't dislike him. I just don't like him." Aragorn gave her a look. "In the place where I'm from, the story of Middle Earth is well known by everyone, and we have sort of pictures of how you guys look like. Well, that's not really it but you get the point. Creepy I know. Anyway, every single girl loves Legolas because he's an elf and of course because of his looks. I'm not really fond of people like that. And I don't want to be around someone who thinks that just because they're pretty they have the world at their feet."

"I have known Legolas for many years now and I assure you that he is none of what you assume he is. He is actually one of the most generous people I have met. You should know that the reason as to why he offered himself to go to Rivendell for the council in first place was because he was unhappy about the life he led in his homeland, Mirkwood. There, everyone seemed to be as the people you described and was seen as no more than a pretty face. He wanted more than that, and so he left. Do not judge people by their appearances."

"Alright… I'll give him another chance. Or not." She whispered the last part.

Ahead of them were Inez and Beregon giggling and smiling at each other.

"You see that?" Philipa pointed to them.

"Yes…"

"That… means trouble."

"Wha-" Philipa put a hand over his mouth and walked a little faster to be able to hear what the couple was talking about.

* * *

"And then I told her: 'That's not a mouse, it's your shoe!'" Inez said and Beregon started laughing yet again.

"That is hilarious Inez."

"It is! I have a better story though. I had a hamster once and during winter my mom was cleaning its hutch and it seemed to be dead. So she threw it away! Months later we found out that hamsters actually hibernate." Beregon was no longer laughing but now was looking really serious at Inez.

"Your mother threw your hamster away? Without it being dead? How could she do that to a defenseless animal?" Now is the part where all you people should know that elves are extremely sensitive about everything related to the earth – trees, plants, **animals**…

"Yup, but she thought it was dead so it's not like she's a killer."

"You must have been ravaged when you learned that you no longer had your hamster."

"Probably. I don't really remember."

"Here we are." In front of them stood the most well decorated hall Inez had ever seen in her short life. It had this huge long table that covered the hall from one side to the other. If you really want to picture it just imagine the tables in the dining Hall from the Harry Potter movies.

"WOW"

* * *

"Beregon, can you pass me another plate of that brown thingy please?" Philipa asked once she finished her meal.

Inez and Marta exchanged glances and shrugged. Everyone else at the table besides the hobbits had already finished their own meals but Philipa didn't seem to be entirely satisfied yet and kept ignoring the weird glances everyone kept giving her.

"Is the lass always like that?" Gimli asked Inez.

"Actually, she's quite the contrary. Usually we've got to force her to eat."

"I think she has found her own food paradise. She probably just loves Elf food."

"Whare yougus taukibot?" Philipa asked with her mouth full.

"I'll take that as a 'What are you guys talking about'. Gimli asked if you always eat like that."

"Oh."

After Philipa was done Celeborn got up and everyone stopped talking.

"My friends, we are gathered here tonight to discuss important matters. As we all know, the fellowship will be joined by three new members: Inez, Marta and Philipa. We have yet to know the reasons as to why they are in Arda nor if their arrival is known to the enemy. After giving it much thought we have come to the conclusion that the Fellowship will depart a week from now. We cannot hold our borders for much longer and 'tis the best I can offer."

Gasps were heard all over the table.

Aragorn politely stood up and cleared his throat.

"My lord, we are not prepared to our departure. We have not gathered the things we require for the road and the girls are not half prepared for battling. We need at least two more weeks."

"Everything will be set for you then. The enemy is moving, we know not how fast they are but our soldiers have seen them near our border this morning. It is too dangerous for our people to keep you here. I have seen the girls fight myself, they are prepared enough to defend themselves on urgent circumstances and you will keep an extra eye on them."

After this, chaos was settled at the table and everybody seemed to be arguing.

"Marta, what does this mean?" Inez nudged her friend.

"This, my friend, means: 1- no more regular showers, 2- no more comfy beds, 3- Death and Doom. Do I need to be more specific?"

"No more showers?" "No more comfy beds?"

"Guys… I just told you we were leaving for DEATH and DOOM and that's all you care about?"

"Girls, go and rest now. We only have one week to train so the training will much more intense now." Aragorn approached them.

"Hell no…"

"Language!"

* * *

**One week later…**

"This is so sad, I don't want to leave tomorrow!" Philipa said during dinner.

"I agree with you. I will miss the food." Pippin said between bites.

"You're unbelievable Pip." Marta exclaimed while chuckling at the hobbit. And to think he was older than them… he sounded **and** looked just like a child!

Inez seemed to be in some sort of trance and Philipa snapped her fingers in front of her eyes.

"Are you alright?"

"Beregon…" Inez whispered. "I… I need to talk to him."

"You will do that in the morning. After dinner you will go to sleep. You need as much rest as you can get." Aragorn intervened.

* * *

"You'll talk to him in the morning! Just relax." Marta sat in her bed with her legs crossed.

"You don't understand! Tomorrow will be too late, I have to go now." Inez got up and walked towards the door.

Marta and Philipa prepared to go after her but a knock on the door stopped them.

Inez opened the door and saw Beregorn on the other side.

"Ber-" Inez began but he put a finger on her mouth to stop her and motioned to the corner on the other side of the hall. There stood Aragorn sitting seeming to be asleep.

Beregorn leaned in her ear and whispered in a tone so low that only she could hear.

"Tomorrow after breakfast meet me in the Second Hall." He lifted her chin so that they were facing each other's eyes (even if her face only reached his chest). _Is he going to kiss me?_

"Melamin." He whispered and then left. _Mellanwhata?_

Inez stared after him and saw an angry Aragorn looking at her. _Uh-Oh. I bet he thinks Beregorn and I were.._

"G-night!" She waved at him quickly and shut the door.

"What was that all about?" Her friends were now standing in front of her with their arms crossed.

"What do you mean?" Inez asked sweetly.

"Oh girl, you know exactly what we mean."

"Alright." She sighed. "Beregorn told me to meet him tomorrow after breakfast."

"Really? That's great!" Marta hugged Inez and Philipa just stood there trying to have a mental conversation with her.

In Philipa's mind she said: 'You dummie! Don't encourage her! She's going to leave tomorrow and she'll never see him again!

In Marta's mind she understood: 'I really really need to go to the bathroom dude! How in the freaking hell am I going to do that here?' Yes, sometimes they were slow.. really slow.

* * *

"Marta, do you understand elvish?" Inez asked when the three girls were already lying on their beds just talking about the journey that was ahead.

"…"

"Marta! Are you sleeping?" Marta (who had just fallen asleep) snapped her eyes open.

"…Whaa? No. I only know a few words.."

"What does Melanime mean? No wait, it's malenine. No, no that's not it. Mela… melamen? Melanin? MELAMIN! AHA! Do you know what that means?"

"…" Inez looked at her friends who were already fast asleep (this time for good).

"Oh." _Better get some sleep as well._

_

* * *

_

**A/N: Obviously, I completely made up the story about the reason why Legolas went to Rivendell, I know it had to do with Gollum's escape.**

**The story about Inez' hamster is entirely true (sadly..).**

**Ah! You will find out later on why Marta asked Legolas whether he slept or not ;)  
**

**Alright, review! Pweaase (:**

**chapter updated  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:Wow, I just realized how short most of the chapters are, I'm so sorry for that :S**

**I'm not really fond of this chapter but I didn't have many ideas so I just wrote the first thing that came to my mind... the result of that was the randomness in the beginning and the drama in the ending. Not really interesting but yeah.. Enjoy**

* * *

Chapter 10 - Too Late

_*Knock knock*_

"_Girls, wake up!" _Aragorn yelled from the other side of their door.

"…"

"Do we really need to get up?" Philipa whispered.

"No."

"_I CAN HEAR YOU! You have 10 seconds to come to the door and get your bags! .5.6…"_

"Inez get up! Hurry, come on." Marta did her best to wake up Inez before Aragorn hit 10.

"No way.."

"_8.. I'm going to open the door!..9.."_

"AAAAAAAH!"

*BOOM*

"Ohmygod Inez, are you okay?" Philipa asked worriedly at her now injured friend while Marta tried not to laugh at what had just happened.

"Inez? What happened?" Aragorn stayed by the door frame looking at Inez with a nose bleed.

"I..sleep..and they…me to…door..and..you..then..door hit..me." Inez tried to stutter while covering her nose.

"Dude, that was awesome!" Aragorn ignored Marta.

"Inez, are you alright? We should get you to the healers. Come on."

* * *

"You must be more careful during our journey Inez." Aragorn warned her while she drank some green thing the healers gave her.

"Techically **YOU** were the one who wasn't careful since you were the one who opened the door." Philipa pointed out.

"Ew, what is this thing? It's just gross." Inez asked between sips.

Marta grabbed the bottle that contained it only to find that its name was written in elvish.

"This is…Dog's snot! See? It's written right here." Marta showed her friends the bottle knowing they wouldn't understand anything.

Inez' face became green.

"Liar. She's lying right Aragorn?" Inez asked hurriedly looking at the bottle trying to understand what it said.

Marta winked at Aragorn shaking her head but apparently he didn't take the hint.

Aragorn grabbed the bottle.

"Oh no, of course 'tis not. This is made of petals of _Saerïne, _a plant that grows in the gardens of Lothlórien."

"Oh Aragorn you're no fun…" Marta pouted.

"Pardon me?"

"Never mind.."

The elf that was healing Inez said something in elvish to Aragorn and then left.

"Inez, for the next week you will have to drink a cup of this syrup twice a day. Although we will be traveling I will try to remember that, and so will you."

"What? No way in hell I'm drinking that thing again."

"Language!" Aragorn snapped. "And you will drink it if you want your nose to recover healthily. Now come on, we are already late for breakfast and we must leave as soon as we can."

* * *

"That breakfast was just…yummy! And to think that it was the last real meal I'll have in days… I can't believe you didn't eat anything Philipa." Marta said.

"I'm not hungry.. I guess I ate too much yesterday."

"'Ya sure did. Anyways, we've gotta go get ready to leave."

"Yup… wait a sec'. Where's Inez?" The girls looked around and there was no sign of their friend.

"She was here… and then she wasn't… She must be with the vampire-elf." Marta said using their nickname for Beregon.

"Yeah, I just hope she comes back soon."

* * *

"Excuse me, where's the Second Hall?" Inez asked one elf and he pointed east.

Her hands were getting sweatier every second that passed. She could hear everything around her: the birds singing, the water falling down a fountain, the elves singing and laughing… and yet she couldn't hear anything. She couldn't hear anything besides her own heartbeat.

It was beating so quickly and so loudly that she could swear anyone could hear it, especially if they were elves. If Marta had been correct they could hear everything, including her heartbeat.

Inez knew that the hall she was approaching had to be the Second Hall; it was just beautiful, perfect given the circumstances.

It was covered in flowers just like every other part of Lothlórien but that was not what was exceptional about it - well duh.

All those beautiful trees were in a circle, and in the middle it had this huge fountain whose water reflected the moonlight. Inez looked up at the sky and she could see all the stars there, even the smallest ones since it was still too early for the sun to be rising.

She smiled. In one of her long chats with Beregon he had told her about his love for stars.

Then, Inez sat in the comfortable floor and watched the stars waiting for Beregon.

**10 minutes later… **

_Where the heck is Beregon? Don't tell me he was joking… or maybe he forgot.._

"Lady Inez?"

Inez turned around to find an elf looking at her with something in his arms.

"Yes?"

"Hum… Something has occurred and Beregon was not able to come here but he asked me personally to give you this." He gave her a sword. Beregon's sword. As she grabbed her new sword something crossed her mind.

"Wait. Did something happen to him?" Inez asked fighting back the tears forming in her eyes.

"I cannot discuss such matters. Beregon himself is alright though. I was also asked to bring you back to your quarters. It is late and you must leave soon. Come."

_He can't discuss THIS MATTERS BUT HE'S SAYING THAT BEREGON'S FINE? WHAT THE HECK'S GOING ON?

* * *

_

"Maybe it's better this way. For both of you." Philipa told her friend as she stepped out of their bathroom in a towel with puffy red eyes.

"I don't see how."

Marta was looking around her own traveling bag while trying to find something to distract her friend with.

"SHIT!"

"What?" Both Inez and Philipa turned to Marta.

"We have no pads! Nor tampons! What're we gonna do when we-"

"Oh My God! It's gonna be horrible!" Philipa cut her friend off and run to hall trying to find a female-maid.

"Lord! Oh why do we have to face the horrors of PMS? Why us!" Inez lifted her hands talking to the ceiling.

"It's going to be so gross! Just imagine: we're fighting orcs all glorious and stuff and then you realize this huge red spot on your trousers!" Marta imagined their figures and shuddered at the thought.

Philipa walked in the room with a giggling maid.

"Elanor has a solution to our problems." Philipa said weakly as she lifted a hand full of cloths.

"WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS?" Inez yelled as she picked a piece of cloth and eyed it repulsively.

Instead of answering, the maid smiled and left their room and said something on her way out.

"Wha'did she say?" Marta asked.

Just then Aragorn entered their bedroom only to find Philipa full of cloths in her hands and an almost naked Inez examining another.

He gasped at the sight in front of him and turned around facing the opposite wall.

"It's time to go."

* * *

"He's not coming." Marta told Inez who was scanning the huge crowd of elves looking for Beregon.

"I know." Inez frowned and changed subject. "What did Galadriel give you?"

"She gave me this really cool sword made by the elves. And what about you?"

"She didn't give me anything. She said that the gift I had already received here was worth a thousand gifts and that nothing that she could give me would be of such value. And then she said to always listen to my heart."

"What did she mean?" Marta asked confused.

"No idea." Inez shrugged and walked towards the hobbits.

"She is hurting." Aragorn appeared beside her.

"Yup. It's probably for the best though…"

"I doubt that. They are…" He stopped in mid sentence and shook his head. "Come, we must leave now. You will ride with me, Frodo and Sam on the boat."

"Please Please let's just stay here for another while! It has only been three weeks! You had said we would stay here for one month!"

Aragorn looked at her sternly and when he saw that she wasn't going to move he gently grabbed her by the arm and led her towards the boat.

"Wait! I just need to say something to Philipa!"

She ran towards Philipa who was already on her boat with Merry and Pippin.

"Hellooo me friends!" Marta exclaimed to the three people/hobbits sitting who looked at her oddly.

"Shouldn't you be on your boat Marta?" Merry asked pointing towards her boat where Aragorn stood looking at them annoyed.

"Yep, and that's exactly why I'm here. Well, see ya later." She winked at them and hopped towards the next boat.

"MARTA!" She heard Aragorn yelling behind her.

"One more minute!" She said.

"Inez, do you like the water? I like the water! Especially when there are waves and stuff."

"Marta… why are you talking like that, shouldn't you be on your boat?"

"Yup, but I will wait 'til last minute to hop in. When we walk away from Lothlórien we will also be walking away from any hope that everyone will survive so… let's just not think about it shall we?" Marta looked at Inez but she was no longer paying attention. She was staring at the crowd of elves as if there was somebody there. _Beregon_

"Wait, he's he-?" Marta stopped mid sentence with Aragorn pushing her away while grumbling something about causing trouble.

"NOO! WAIT, LET'S STAY HERE! PLEASE!" Marta screamed one last time when Aragorn got himself prepared to leave.

"Lady Marta why must you be so sad about leaving?" Sam asked when they were already about ten feet away from the borders.

"Don't you understand Sam? We're all going to die!" She said exasperated. Frodo gulped and looked down.

* * *

"Wow, I can't believe we're really leaving. This place is beautiful." Philipa said looking at her surroundings as they started sailing."

"It is. The Old Took always told us stories about places like this but he didn't make them justice. There are no words to describe this." Merry answered and Pippin nodded.

* * *

Inez and Beregon stood motionless staring at each other.

When Legolas started moving away from the borders they both seemed to snap out of their mental trance.

Beregon quickly started running through the huge crowd of elves trying to reach the bank of the river.

"INEZ!"

"BEREGON!" Inez stood up from the boat making it shake everywhere and Gimli pulled her down.

It was too late. Too late to meet each other. Too late to be together.

* * *

**A/N: Hope it wasn't too dramatic for you... Please let me know what you think, I will appreciate it.**

**Next chapter: their journey begins!  
**

**chapter updated (wow, I just realized how cheesy the last part is)**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11 - Water...Water.. Need to pee!

"The lassie hasn't spoken a word ever since we left Lothlórien." Gimli whispered to Legolas. Actually… he tried to whisper, but apparently dwarves' voices are way to grave for them to whisper.

It was true, even when Gimli talked about asking Galadriel for a hair of hers she did not speak a word.

"Indeed. It is not something one is happy to see without being able to help. I saw it in his eyes; he has fallen for her but does not believe it is a possible love. She is too young, a mere child. And in his eyes the race difference is too much of a barrier." Legolas **whispered **back (He's an elf… so obviously he succeeded)

"And because of that he thinks the best is not to do anything and live forever in despair? Does he not know of our own companion's story? And then you say dwarves are the complicated ones…" Gimli raised his voice.

"What are you guys talking about?" Inez looked at the two of them.

"Nothing of importance." Legolas quickly said and put on his 'charming' elf smile.

She looked at him in disdain but let the matter drop.

"I'm tired of being sitting! When are we stopping riding so I can get out of this damn boat?" She tried to loll but it was sort of hard since the boat wasn't exactly big.

"It won't be long before we stop to rest." Aragorn spoke up from his boat and Gimli mentioned something about orcs.

"Oh, okay." Inez said shocked, it was sort of finally hitting her what was happening. The other boat was really close to hers so she grabbed Marta's arm and whispered quickly.

"Marta… orcs are like… those ugly things that appear in the movie?"

Marta didn't answer but as soon as Inez looked at her friend's frightened face she knew that she was correct. And that… was not good.

* * *

"Hey Boromir, what are orcs?" Philipa asked Boromir.

She had heard Marta talking about them but honestly she had no idea what they were.

"They are creatures, monsters. Some say that originally they were deformed elves. I know not how to describe them to you, but know this: when you shall see one, you will know it immediately."

"Oh so they're the bad guys... Just plain awesome."

* * *

"I need to pee." Marta said out of the blue.

"Marta, you did not just say that…" Aragorn said shaking his head.

"Yep, I did. I. Need. To. Pee. Do you understand Aragorn?" Marta looked at Sam who was blushing. "Well, obviously Sam does understand but I'll explain it to you anyway. I meant that I really need to find a-"

"Marta! Enough. You will have to wait; we are not stopping yet."

Marta pouted. "Fine, if I pee in my pants it's your problem, not mine."

Aragorn shook his head and sighed.

"Boromir, Legolas! We will stop for the day."

"So soon? The sun will only come down in a few hours." Boromir protested.

"Yes, so soon. Follow me."

Marta turned to Frodo and Sam and winked.

"Yay, finally!" Then, she remembered something. "Actually… not yay! So not way…" She muttered.

"Is something wrong?" Sam asked.

"Oh, it's nothing! Every thing's fine!" She quickly fake-smiled and looked at Boromir. _Oh god. I mean Oh Eru__, pleaaase help us._

"Lady Marta is very strange." Sam whispered to Frodo as they approached the shore.

* * *

"Sam, you are the best cook I have ever met." Inez said between bites of the roast chicken Sam had cooked for dinner.

"Seriously." Marta nodded and the poor hobbit blushed from all the attention.

"You should try his smashed potatoes. They are the best." Merry spoke up next to Aragorn.

"I don't really like smashed potatoes but if you're going to cook them Sam I will definitely try them."

"They are not that good." Sam tried to excuse himself rubbing his head embarrassed.

"Yes they are! And the mushrooms you make are delicious as well." Pippin said while serving himself another plate.

After everyone was done eating, Boromir and Aragorn got away from the group to speak and Sam went to find Frodo who had not eaten anything during dinner.

* * *

"Marta." Inez called. "Marta." Still no answer."Marta!"

Marta finally snapped out of her thoughts.

"Sorry, what?"

"What's the matter?"

Marta pulled Inez closer and made sure Legolas wasn't nearby, so she was the only one who could hear her.

"I..I don't know if Boromir is going to die tomorrow. I can't remember some parts of the movie and it's driving me insane not knowing whether we'll still sail again or if it's going to happen tomorrow."

"Oh."

"Is something wrong?" Pippin asked noticing the serious faces of the two girls.

"No, every thing's fine." Inez smiled. "Where's Philipa?"

Merry pointed at Philipa sleeping on the floor.

"She was really tired from the journey." Legolas joined them. "You should rest as well. We will leave early."

"You're right." Inez said and proceeded to find an empty spot on the floor to settle herself.

"I'm not sleepy." Marta told him just as yawn came from her mouth betraying her.

"Of course you're not." Aragorn smirked from behind her. "If you don't want to sleep now, then don't. But tomorrow don't whine about being tired."

"Whatever." Marta mumbled and sat by a tree trying to rest.

* * *

"What troubles you?" Legolas asked the girls during breakfast.

"Me?" Marta and Inez asked at the same time.

"Yes, both of you."

"I had a nightmare." Inez said while looking at her food. Actually, she had dreamed about Beregon.

When Marta noticed that supposedly now was her turn to say whatever was on her mind she decided to lie. She wasn't exactly going to tell them that she hadn't slept at all since she kept thinking about Boromir's death.

"I had a nightmare as well."

Everyone besides the hobbits (poor innocent things) knew too well that neither one of them was telling them the entire truth - or the truth at all.

"Very well. Finish your breakfast fast, we will departure as soon as you're done." Aragorn said and got up to pack his things.

"There's something you guys are not telling me." Philipa told Marta and Inez when they were finally the only ones eating.

"What do you mean? Of course we're not!" Marta exclaimed chuckling and giving Inez **the look** – you know… that look that clearly says 'what do we do now?'

"Don't lie." Philipa said getting slightly mad.

"Well, Marta's not sure whether Bor-" Inez stopped in mid sentence when she saw the **other look** Marta was giving her – as in 'shut the heck up!'

"Whether Boromir would mind if I sailed with him this time. My boat is waaay too boring for me." Marta said quickly.

"Oh, so that's it?" Philipa asked and the other two girls nodded. "Fine for me." And then she left them.

"Why didn't you tell her the truth?" Inez asked Marta.

"Are you dumb or something? Boromir is like Philipa's big brother. If she finds out that he's going to die she will be crushed."

"You're right… But she will be crushed anyway. I mean… we'll all be crushed."

They sat in silence until Aragorn came to tell them they were leaving.

* * *

_What if… what if Boromir's not the one to die? What if he's not the only one to die? What if me, Inez or Philipa die as well? ._

"We will stop early today to rest and then we will travel during the night." Aragorn said as everyone hopped into their own boats.

As a result of the girls chat earlier, Marta was traveling with Boromir (which didn't help her condition at all).

"I'm hungry." Pippin said just as Boromir started paddling.

"But you just ate Pip." Merry retorted.

"I know, but I'm hungry again."

"I can't help but wonder how come you stay so thin if you eat so much." Boromir said.

"We're not thin." Merry unzipped his jacket to show them his tummy. "See?"

"Oh, you're not fat either." Marta told him rolling her eyes. Boromir just chuckled.

"That's true. You should see my uncle. Now that's one fat hobbit." Merry said remembering his uncle.

"He's right you know. He couldn't enter his own house so he had to buy a bigger door." The two hobbits filled the air with their laughs earning a few glares from a certain dwarf and ranger.

"Oh don't laugh at him. Poor guy!" Philipa said from the other boat. She had heard the story.

"Philipa is being condescending. Just when I thought that nothing could surprise me." Boromir smirked.

"Whatever." She mumbled from the other boat and started humming some song.

* * *

"Hey, the river ends there!" Inez pointed to the path ahead of them.

"Yes, there is a water fall."

"So are we stopping or what?" She asked nervously. _Are these guys maniacs or something?_

Just as she said that they started paddling towards the shore.

"God, for a second there I thought we were going to go through the fall." Inez sighed.

"Lass, we may be many things but we are not suicidal." Gimli retorted as he grabbed his things to leave the boat.

"That's what I thought but with you guys one never knows. It's like everything is possible." She shrugged.

"True." Aragorn added from behind her.

"We cross the lake at nightfall, hide the boats and continue on foot… We approach Mordor from the North." He continued and then started an argument with Gimli .

"Okey-dokey." Philipa said and quickly sat by a tree trying to get some more sleep. Sam followed suit.

Everyone besides Marta and Inez seemed to be busy doing something and the two of them seemed to get more nervous each second.

"Oh god, god, god. Should we warn them? Should we not? Should we run? Should we hide? Should we fight? Should we save him?" Marta started pacing as she noticed the time was passing.

"Marta. Stop. Don't think about it. We can't think about it. It's better if we don't." Inez said.

"TELL ME, HOW CAN WE NOT THINK ABOUT IT WHEN IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN ANY SECOND NOW!" She practically screamed gaining everyone's attention.

"What can you not think about?" Aragorn and Legolas joined them looking sort of troubled.

Just when Marta was going to answer Merry spoke up.

"Where's Frodo?"

Her first reaction was to look at the place where Boromir had been seating. He was missing.

Inez and Marta both exchanged glances. It was happening. There was no way to stop it now.

Everyone besides them set off to find the two missing people.

"Marta, what should we do now?" Inez asked getting scared. She remembered this part of the movie.

Instead of answering Marta started crying.

"He's going to die! He can't die Inez! I don't want him to die!" Marta cried.

"I know. I know." Inez started sobbing as well and almost let herself believe that there was no point in going after them, everything was going to happen anyway.

That was not a movie that they were watching. That was real life, with real people who had real feelings. And those people were their friends, not some characters from a book or a movie.

"We can't be like this Marta. We must do something. Even if we can't save Boromir, we can help our friends. We can help ourselves."

"You're right." They got up and started running.

"Wait. We can die out there!" Inez squealed suddenly.

"Yeah, but we can die here as well." Marta gulped as they started hearing swords clashing not far from there.

* * *

**a/n: so.. what did you think?**

**chapter updated  
**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12 - Goodbye

Just when Marta and Inez approached the place where the battle was going on, they saw _them_. And by them, I mean those ugly, filthy creatures that go by the name of Orcs.

Almost instantly Inez started feeling like puking because yeah they were **THAT** ugly. And smelly.

"I'm not so sure we should help them anymore." Inez said forgetting everything besides the monsters that stood just a few feet away from them.

Fighting the urge to run away Marta spoke up.

"No. We can do this. We can do this."

Just as they picked up their own swords correctly, an orc noticed them.

He, along with some of his nearby 'buddies', parted from the group that was fighting their friends and started walking towards them.

"Oh, look wha' we've here'." One said as they approached them.

The girls, scared as they were remained put without knowing what to do and their friends - much to their misfortune - had not noticed their presence.

"'re they Halflings?" Another asked. Inez looked at Marta as they took a step back.

"Perhaps. Don' kill 'em. The master wants them." One that looked like the boss snapped.

"Yes, bu' they won' be needin their arms anymo' will they?" The first one who had talked asked while looking at their arms hungrily.

_Oh god, oh god. I'm dead. I'm so dead. I don't want to die. Not here. Not now. Uh, they smell like rotten eggs mixed with poop. I wonder if they ever showered.. Probably not. No, no, what am I thinking about! I need to think about getting out of here alive. Marta was right, we can do this. We just need to believe it. _Inez thought.

_Well, this is it. I'm dead. If they cut my arm I will bleed to death. And then I will die. Duh, of course I'll die if I bleed to death. No, no. Focus! We're gonna get out of here alive!... And in one piece. Yes, yes we are. Oh who am I kidding, we're so dead… _Marta thought.

"No! We' not t'harm them. Jus' brin'em." The boss retorted and they advanced at hem.

The girls extended their swords at the same time.

"Are you ready?" Marta asked unsure. The two girls exchanged a glance and Inez nodded. They both gulped knowing that what they were about to do next was probably the last thing they would ever do.

"AHHHHHHHHH!" They charged forwards and each of them ran to one of the orcs.

What happened next should be featured in one of those really bad comedy/action movies.

Inez tried to aim at the gut of one of the orcs but apparently when you're nervous and scared to death your hand sort of refuses to do what you want… So she ended up hitting him… a little lower than she meant to.

The effect was still the same, or probably better because the orc quickly bent over and fell to the floor in pain.

Meanwhile, Marta tried to hit an orcs' face but instead she sliced a bit of his arm. _Damn this shit is sharp! _ Of course it wasn't enough to bring him down so the orc smirked and charged his own weapon at her.

"Uh-oh."

"Marta! I think I found a way to stop them! Aim at their groin!" Inez yelled just as she hit another one. _I didn't really need the sword after all._

"What?" Marta asked turning around to face her while the orc took the opportunity to move closer to her.

Said orc grabbed her arms making her scream at the top of her lungs. Luckily for her, her screams were loud enough for Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli (who had moved farther away) to hear.

The orc let go of her as quickly as he had grabbed her. Maybe even quicker. He was shot right in the middle of his eyes.

She looked up and saw their friends running towards them fighting orcs on their way.

The girls were finally able to sigh. Now that they knew they got their friends with them it seemed like they were almost in no danger at all. **Almost.**

"Are you alright?" Aragorn asked as he cut off the head of an orc next to him.

"Yes, somehow we managed to stay alive." Marta tried to crack a joke.

Inez got closer to them and just as she was about to open her mouth Aragorn killed an orc who had appeared behind her.

Suddenly the horn of Gondor was heard.

"The horn of Gondor!" Legolas yelled.

"Boromir!" Aragorn said.

Everyone looked ahead and most of the orcs started running forward.

When Aragorn glanced at the girls he knew something REALLY BAD was about to happen.

"Stay here." He said sternly and then started running in the direction of the noise.

"Oh god…" Marta whispered. Time seemed to stop when Inez looked at her. That was it. There was nothing they could do now. Boromir was soon to be dead.

Inez fell to her knees.

"What's wrong?" Legolas asked as he kept shooting the orcs who still hadn't left. They weren't many, since most of them had run off when they heard Boromir's horn but they were enough.

No one spoke but the answer arrived unsaid. Legolas' eyes widened as his arms kept moving mechanically killing the orcs.

Gimli yelled in rage and fought the orcs even harder.

Marta dropped her sword and looked at the floor numbly.

Boromir was gone.

* * *

"NOOOO!" Philipa screamed as an orc shot Boromir in the chest.

He had been trying to protect her, Merry and Pippin from the orcs and so far it had worked.

"Boromir!" The hobbits yelled.

Instead of dropping dead, Boromir kept fighting the orcs forcefully determined to protect them.

It didn't seem real to Philipa. Boromir couldn't die, he was like an older brother to her. No, Boromir would stay alive and everything would be fine. Marta hadn't said anything about him dying. _Oh wait. She once said…. Oh god. No. No._

The hobbits started throwing rocks at the hobbits trying to get them off Boromir's tail – obviously they did not succeed.

Determined not to let him die Philipa aimed her sword at the nearby orcs and started charging forwards shutting down the rational world for once.

The same orc that had shot him the first time shot him again. And again. Boromir fell to his knees.

The orcs grabbed Merry and Pippin but Philipa managed to stay free for the time being. It was highly possible that she had been stabbed many times, but the adrenaline rush was too much for her to notice anything besides Boromir.

"Don't you dare to freakin' die on me 'kay? I'll kill you myself if you close your eyes!" She yelled as she kicked an orc. And another one. And another one.

Boromir remained silent as the orcs who had grabbed the hobbits passed him by.

The orc who shot him approached him and aimed at his heart smirking.

When she saw this, Philipa tried to run towards him but it was no use. The orcs had finally grabbed her and there was no way she could free herself. They moved away from the place where he stood. She stopped fighting them as she looked back one last time at Boromir. He was a dead man.

And so was she.

* * *

**a/n: don't forget to review!**

**chapter updated  
**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hello, I'm so sorry for the wait.**

**This chapter has a few dialogs taken from the movie and I'm sorry for that.**

* * *

Chapter 13 – Now what?

Legolas squeezed Inez' shoulder giving her a somewhat forced smile.

"Not all is lost if there is still hope."

"He is a strong lad. And now he has Aragorn with him to help. He will be alright." Gimli said.

"No. You didn't see it like I did. You don't know what happened. I do. It would be impossible for him to stay alive after what happened." Marta whispered.

"It surely is impossible if you keep thinking so. The elf is right. You must not lose your faith in him." Gimli stabbed one of the last Uruk-Hais as he said that.

"Come." Legolas extended one hand to each of the girls to help them up.

They started running towards the place where most of the Uruk-Hais and orcs had run to.

The battle seemed to be over since most of them were either dead or gone. And those who were not were soon to be.

"Marta, maybe he's not dead after all. Just think about it, we're here. We changed the course of the story here. Philipa is with Boromir, maybe she saved him." Inez said as they run as fast as they could.

Marta stayed silent.

When they approached the place where there was a bigger amount of dead orcs they spotted Aragorn kneeling over someone talking quietly.

"I would have followed you, my brother... my captain, my king." They heard Boromir say.

Inez looked at Marta hoping to see any signs of happiness there. She would know if anything was different from the original story.

Tears filled Marta's eyes as she shook her head sadly.

"Oh." Inez whispered shocked at how real it felt. The pain.

When Aragorn bent down to kiss Boromir's head they knew it was over. Hope or no hope, Boromir was dead.

Aragorn stood up as Legolas and Gimli approached him.

"They will look for his coming from the white tower...but he will not return." He said looking down.

Everyone remained silent mourning for their lost friend until Legolas spoke quietly.

"The hobbits?...Lady Philipa?" Everyone looked at Aragorn.

"Oh no..." Marta whispered. "Philipa is not a hobbit."

"They've taken them." Aragorn breathed.

Not hearing what had been said Inez sobbed looking at Boromir.

"We can't just leave him here.." She remarked.

"No, we can't." Aragorn agreed. "We will give him the most noble burial possible."

They gathered Boromir's weapons from the limp bodies on the floor.

As the men grabbed his body carefully the girls stood quietly in the back.

"Huh, smells like dead or something." Inez said disgusted.

"Honey, look around. You're surrounded with dead fugly things." Marta retorted.

"Oh. Right." Inez looked down only to find that her right foot was resting on the carcass of a dead Uruk-Hai.

Without thinking she kicked it forcefully making it hit Gimli's head.

"Check Point." Marta said chuckling slightly.

"Oh shoot! Sorry Gimli!" Inez apologized.

Nobody else seemed to find the situation funny except for Legolas whom seemed to grin for a second before returning to his expressionless face.

* * *

Suddenly, as they walked towards the place where their boats stood Inez stopped abruptly.

"Crap! Where is Philipa? And Merry? And Pippin? And -"

"And Frodo? And Sam?" Marta finished sarcastically making hand movements. She looked at Inez. "Really. Really? They have been missing for hours and you only noticed it now?"

Inez nodded confused.

"Should I not be worried or something?"

Marta sighed.

"Of course you should be worried!" They started walking slowly to make sure no one else heard them. When Marta was sure that Legolas couldn't hear them she spoke.

"Well, you don't really have to worry about Frodo and Sam. They will be fine in the end. At least I think they will be. Merry and Pippin are supposed to be fine as well but about them I'm not so sure anymore. They were taken by the orcs along with Philipa. They won't be killed because they are hobbits and the 'bad guys' think they have the ring. So they will escape. Eventually. Philipa I don't know... she's not a hobbit so I'm not sure what they will do to her."

"Well.. she's short for a human, right? Maybe she will be mistaken by a hobbit and everything will go well for her as well."

"Yeah... maybe."

They approached the others just when they had finished placing Boromir on one of the boats. They were now putting his weapons around him.

"God, I can't believe this is happening." Inez whispered.

"I know... me neither Sam, me neither." Marta nodded sadly.

Inez turned to her.

"Sorry to break it for ya but my name's Inez, not Sam."

Marta looked at her as if she was dumb ready to answer her but then seemed to think better of it and sighed shaking her head.

"I would answer that stupid remark but I'm too tired and you probably wouldn't understand."

"I hate it when you do that." Inez complained sitting on a rock.

"Do what?" Marta questioned smirking.

"That thing you do to make me feel stupid."

"But you are stupid, I just help you to realize it." She grinned.

They stood up to be with their friends as they placed the boat on the water.

"He was a fine man." Inez said quietly without knowing what else to say.

"Indeed he was." Legolas agreed.

They watched the boat sail away slowly.

When it was no longer in sight Legolas turned to Aragorn.

"If we are quick, we will catch Frodo and Sam before nightfall."

Everyone looked to the other side of the river where there stood in the riverbank Frodo and Sam's boat.

Aragorn didn't answer.

"You mean not to follow them.." Legolas stated.

"Frodo's fate is no longer in our hands." Aragorn replied.

"Then it has all been in vain.. the fellowship has failed." Gimli said.

"What?" Inez nodged Marta's shoulder. "Are they giving up? Is this supposed to happen?"

"Shut up."

"Not if we hold true to each other. We will not abandon Merry and Pippin to torment and death, not while we have strength left." Aragorn continued.

He pulled out a hunting knife out of his pack and strapped it on.

"Leave all that can be spared behind. We travel light."

"Let's hunt some orc!" Marta shouted making everyone look at her oddly.

"What?"

* * *

**A/N: I know, I know... Boromir died..**

**chapter updated  
**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14 - Seriously. Seriously?

It had been three days since the fellowship had split up and everyone's moods were finally starting to light up.

"Can we just stop for a while?" Marta asked panting as they climbed up a mountain.

"No." Aragorn answered as if they had not been running for the past 10 hours.

"I...can't...run...anymore." Inez stopped catching her breath.

Gimli smiled proud of himself, even though he was extremely tired he wasn't the slowest of the group.

"Aragorn, we should rest for now." Legolas stated looking at the exhausted girls behind them. "As much as we want to find them we will not be able to if we keep making them strain themselves this much."

Aragorn sighed defeated. Legolas was right, if the girls kept going like that in a few days they would not be able to move, let alone run.

"Alright, we will stop for the day."

The girls smiled relieved and dropped to the floor panting.

"Thank you so much Legolas! If I weren't so tired I would hug you." Marta said trying to catch her breath.

"Definitely! I could just kiss you right now!" Inez joked.

Legolas made a face thinking she actually meant it.

"I am flattered Inez but as much as I care for you I do not feel comfortable ab-" He started embarrassed and Inez stared at him confused.

"Oh relax Legolas, she was joking!" Marta clarified as she got up.

"Oh." He rubbed his head. Everyone else laughed at him.

"Seriously, a few weeks ago I would have actually meant it -" Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at Inez. "**Because** I didn't know you! And don't make that face Marta you would too! It's not a secret that he's incredibly hot. Anyway, as I was saying, a few weeks ago I would have meant it but now I was simply joking, I would never see you in that way. Not anymore." She clarified.

"Hot?" Gimli touched Legolas' arm. "I don't think so, he's rather cool.. And what did that have to do with what you were saying?"

"I don't think that she meant that his body temperature was hot Gimli." Aragorn countered.

"Then what-" Gimli started.

"OKAY! Now that we're over this awkward moment, what's for dinner?" Inez started walking towards them and looked up at the sky noticing that it was not exactly dark. "Or lunch or whatever it is? Man, it's hard to keep with time when our routine is all messed up."

"Lembas." Legolas said.

"Oh not again.." Marta complained. "I think I will die if I eat any more of that thing."

"Stop complaining. If you had not eaten so much that day then we might still have chicken." Aragorn said reaching for some lembas from his pack.

"We were hungry." Inez muttered glaring at him.

Scowling the girls started eating their own lembas.

"Despite it being Elf food I quite like this." Gimli said after taking a bite.

"It's not that I don't like it. It's just that after awhile it gets too repetitive." Inez clarified.

"Exactly!" Marta agreed.

"Too bad." Aragorn replied and the girls looked at him shocked.

"What was that? Did I just hear Aragorn use modern slang?" Marta mocked.

Gimli and Legolas chuckled at the ranger's face.

"That is what happens when I spend too much time with you." He scowled.

* * *

"This is nice." Marta said lying on her improvised bed as she stared at the stars.

"Yep.. man I feel so tired I think I could sleep for a week." Inez said beside her.

Gimli was already asleep and Aragorn was talking to Legolas quietly.

"That is so true.." Marta started to shut her eyes and soon everything was black.

"Goodnight." Inez whispered as she felt herself fall asleep.

* * *

Marta woke up in the middle of night startled by a nightmare she couldn't remember.

She looked around, everyone seemed asleep and Gimli's snores were pretty loud even though he was asleep on the other side of their campsite. Inez was smiling and Marta noticed that she was drooling.

"Go figure..." She whispered shaking her head. _I need to pee._ She got up and walked to the bushes to do her business.

When she returned to their campsite she looked over at Legolas and Aragorn.

Aragorn was snoring softly with his arms crossed over his chest.

Marta looked at Legolas and jumped. He had his eyes opened. For a moment she feared he was dead but then remembered that she had read somewhere that elves slept with their eyes opened.

She looked at Inez and grinned walking towards her.

"Inez! Oh my god Inez, wake up!" She whispered as she shook Inez.

"What?" Inez asked sleepily.

"It's Legolas, I think something's wrong with him!" Marta tried to sound as worried as she could.

Inez quickly sat up and they ran towards the place where Legolas was sleeping.

"AAAAAAAHH!" Inez started screaming. "OhMyGodOhMyGodOhMyGod. Oh no! Please no!" She started shaking him uncontrollably and Aragorn and Gimli woke up with the noise.

"What happened?" Aragorn asked as he and Gimli eyed their surroundings trying to find an intruder somewhere.

Legolas woke up startled with Inez trembling and crying looking at him.

"Legolas is dead!" Inez screamed and Marta couldn't sustain herself anymore so she fell to the floor laughing.

"What?" Legolas asked at the same time as Gimli and Aragorn.

Inez looked at Aragorn and Gimli and spoke pointing at Legolas.

"His eyes are opened and...and he's not breathing!" She turned to Legolas. "See?" She turned again to the other guys and suddenly as she turned back she saw Legolas looking at her confused. _Huh?_

"Are you alright Inez?" Aragorn asked worried approaching her.

"Maybe she's dreaming." Said Gimli.

"Is something wrong?" Legolas finally spoke up.

"But-But you were dead!" Inez shrieked looking at Legolas not listening to the others.

Suddenly everyone looked at the figure rolling on the floor laughing.

"Marta, what is going on?" Aragorn asked seriously and everyone else nodded.

"Oh man! I just wish I had a camera!" She replied still laughing.

"Camera? Never before have I heard of such thing." Gimli said.

"Why are you laughing Marta?" Legolas asked ignoring the fact that he didn't know what a camera was either.

"Yeah Marta,** what is so funny**?" Inez asked furious realizing she had been set up.

Marta got up trying to keep a straight face but failed tremendously.

"Marta!" Aragorn snapped angry. He was definitely not happy about being awaken in the middle of his much needed rest.

"Okay Okay!" She stopped laughing at last. "I woke up and I saw that Legolas was sleeping with his eyes opened so I thought I'd prank Inez by telling her that I thought he was dead. I never thought that she would react like this! It was much more awesome than I could ever imagine!"

Aragorn sighed and closed his eyes tightly as if counting to ten.

"Marta." He said as calmly as he could. "Go to sleep, we'll talk in the morning."

That been said everyone went back to their own sleeping positions and fell asleep.

* * *

**A/N: I'm so sorry for the wait! I didn't know what to do with this chapter but then I figured I'd write something less serious because the last chapters have been too dramatic. I hope you enjoyed (:**

**chapter updated  
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	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15 - Understanding Elvish.. or not**

A few days and body aches later they were finally catching up on the orcs - or so Aragorn said.

"The red sun rises. Blood has been spilled tonight." Legolas said looking at the sky.

"I bet I lost like 100 pounds on the last week or so." Inez said as she wiped sweat from her forehead.

"Exaggerate much?" Marta replied looking ahead. Suddenly Aragorn bent down looking at the floor. He stood up and gestured to follow him as he hid behind a rock.

The riders of Rohan appeared on their horses but didn't seem to notice them.

"Oh crap!" Inez exclaimed. "Marta, are they good guys or bad guys?" She whispered the last part.

"Good guys. Just... don't get on their nerves."

"Riders of Rohan! What news from the Mark?" Aragorn yelled coming out of their hidden spot.

The riders turned around and surrounded them with spears towards them.

"What business does an Elf, a Man, a Dwarf and two Girls have in the Riddermark? Speak quickly!" The leader said.

"Give me your name, horse-master and I shall give you mine." Gimli retorted.

"I would cut off your head, Dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground." The leader replied.

Legolas drew his bow.

"You would die before your stroke fell." He said harshly.

"Yeah!" Inez yelled and then the spears got closer to her and Legolas. "Just kidding!" She held up her hands as if in surrender but the spears got even closer. Marta rolled her eyes.

Aragorn grabbed Legolas' arm and put it down and Inez got the hint and put hers down as well. Gimli sighed relieved.

"I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn, this is Gimli son of Glóín, Legolas of the woodland realm, and hum.. - he looked at the girls - Marta and Inez from.. Gondor."

Marta bit her lip trying to suppress a grin. Aragorn was actually lying, she would have to remember that later to mock him.

_What is a Gondor? _Inez thought.

Éomer - the leader - looked at the girls oddly and then spoke up sadly.

"Théoden no longer recognizes friend from foe. Not even his own kin." He removed his helmet which seemed to be a code for 'they're not our enemies' for the riders raised their spears.

Éomer continued talking about Saruman and how he had spies everywhere.

"We are no spies. We track a party of Uruk-Hai westward across the plain. They have taken three of our friends captive." Aragorn said.

"The Uruks are destroyed, we slaughtered them during the night." Éomer responded.

"But there were two hobbits, and a young girl much like these two. Did you seem them with them?" Gimli asked mentioning the girls as he spoke.

"They would be small, only children to our eyes." Aragorn went on.

"Come on.. Philipa's small but not thaaaat small." Marta muttered under her breath.

"We left none alive. We pilled the carcasses and burned them." Éomer said.

"Dead?" Gimli asked disbelievingly.

"What?" Inez said at the same time.

Éomer looked at her and nodded. "I am sorry."

Legolas put his hand on Gimli's shoulder in comfort.

Inez gasped with tears in her eyes and Marta was unsure whether to be worried that something might have gone wrong or relieved that everything seemed to have gone as planned - if that made any sense.

Then, three horses came forward. Marta frowned, she could swear in the original there were only two of them.. meaning only two dead riders? Now there were three?

"Hasufel, Arod, Maethor. May these horses bear you better fortune than their former masters. Farewell." Éomer told them. "Look for your friends, but do not trust to hope. It has forsaken these lands." He turned to the riders. "We ride north!"

And then they were off.

Everyone's hopes seemed to be crushed then.

"Marta, you will ride with me. Inez, you'll go with Legolas." Aragorn said quietly. "Gimli, I am certain you won't mind riding alone."

Gimli grumbled something in response and the girls walked up to to their respective horses.

With Legolas' help Inez got on top of the horse easily but Marta couldn't seem to get on top of hers as much help as Aragorn was giving her.

"I can't do it!" Marta said exasperated with her cheeks red from embarrassment.

"Of course you can! Just grab my arm and once I push you upwards slide your right leg and try to get it on the other side of the horse." Aragorn retorted as calmly as he could. The others just watched the scene before them trying not to laugh at Marta's annoyance for not being able to get on the horse and Aragorn's wasted efforts to help her.

Once again Aragorn tried to get her up but just like the previous times he failed miserably. Mostly because she would chicken out once her leg started to go up.

He sighed and got down of the horse.

"What are y-" Marta started but he grabbed her by the waist and pulled onto the horse. "Oh. Hum.. so.. right.." She stammered blushing as he got on top of the horse as well.

Inez giggled at the look on Marta's face.

"WHAT ARE YOU GUYS LOOKING AT?" Marta yelled when she noticed that everyone else was watching her.

"Nothing." Gimli replied sheepishly and Legolas averted his eyes while Inez just grinned.

"Let's go." Aragorn said. He half turned to Marta, who was behind him. "You might want to hold on to my waist."

"Wha- whoaah!" The horse started moving and both girls - who weren't holding onto nothing - almost fell from their horses.

Scratch that, Marta almost fell from her horse but before that she put her arms around Aragorn's waist as tightly as she could. Inez actually fell from hers.

"Are you alright?" Legolas asked worried. Marta would have laughed hysterically if she weren't so frightened she might fall from her horse as well if she moved an inch.

"Oh yes, I'm just great!" Inez complained as she got up from the floor brushing the dust off her shoulders. He helped her up.

"At least I'm not the one who can't even get herself on top of a stupid horse." She said bitterly looking at Marta. Legolas looked at her disapprovingly and Marta glared at her.

"Hey, you idiot! That stupid horse has feelings!"

* * *

Soon enough they approached the place where the carcasses of orcs and uruk-hais were burning.

Inez was starting to feel nauseated because of the sight in front of her and the intense smell of burning flesh.

"Why couldn't they just kill them and then leave? What's the point of burning those things?" Marta asked to herself once they got down of their horses.

There was nothing that told them that their friends were still alive, since there were no living things amongst the piles of dead orcs.

Gimli found one of their small sword belts.

"It's one of their wee belts."

"Hiro hyn hîdh ab 'wanath." Legolas said sadly and Marta smacked his arm forcefully.

"Don't you dare to even think that they're dead." She said menacingly and his eyes widened.

"What did he say?" Inez asked puzzled at the fact that Marta understood elvish. Everyone else just stared at her wondering the same.

"No idea." Marta shrugged. She remembered from the movie that he was saying something like 'may they rest in peace'.

Legolas was about to ask her something but thought better of it and remained silent even if confused.

Aragorn kicked an orc helmet in frustration and then screamed as he fell onto his knees and put his head down.

Everyone seemed shocked but Marta laughed remembering something.

He turned to her and glared. "WHAT?"

She was actually frightened at his tone, Aragorn had never before been so angry at her - and that was saying a lot.

"Nothing! It's just that.. I watched the special features of the Lord of The Rings DVD and they explained that Viggo Mor- well, the person who was playing Aragorn - had broken two toes when he hit that helmet and that the scream that was supposed to be of frustration was actually of pain." She rambled and everyone stared at her as if she had grown a second head.

"You really need to stop talking about those movies." Inez said loudly shaking her head.

"I would ask what is that you are talking about but I'm afraid I do not want to know the answer and we have more important matters to take care of." He replied as he eyed the floor.

"We failed them." Gimli said.

"Come on! Where's that hope you so wanted us to have?" Inez shouted annoyed.

Marta sat on the floor looking at Aragorn following the hobbits' tracks. He kept telling them his interpretation of the steps on the floor, and how they had crawled and then stopped and their ropes were cut and -

"You only recognize hobbits step foots?" Inez asked suddenly trying to understand how he was seeing anything at all.

"Yes."

Everyone besides Aragorn - who kept looking at the floor - looked at each other worried about Philipa. Then Legolas and Gimli rushed to the piles of Uruks again trying to find anything that looked liked a young girl.

Inez and Marta tried to calm each other down.

"Wait." Aragorn said out of the blue and everyone else stopped what they were doing.

"She was here. She was trying to escape an orc. There's a considerable amount of blood here." He kept walking following her trail. "She managed to come this far, then her trail ends." He finally looked back at the others and went back to the place where he had tracked the hobbits' step foots.

"I'm certain the lassie's not in these piles of filthy orcs." Gimli said wrinkling his nose at the smell.

"Yes, and the riders of Rohan said themselves they had not left one breathing creature here." Legolas said looking at the forest ahead of them.

"The three of them must have gotten into the forest." Inez said relieved just as Aragorn noticed something.

"The tracks lead away from the battle, into Fangorn Forest."

"Fangorn! What madness drove them in there?" Gimli said eying the forest.

"What's so bad about it? It's just a forest..." Inez said and as they entered it.

* * *

"Oh god, what are we getting ourselves into?" Inez whispered looking around finally understanding why everyone was so reluctant about going there.

"A huge surprise." Marta whispered back and grinned at the thought of meeting Gandalf.

Aragorn looked back at them and seemed to notice Marta's happy face.

"Do not get your hopes too up." He told her sternly but it did not reach his eyes. He was actually worried.

Marta gulped, she was pretty sure that in the original story he was not as hopeless. She interpreted that as if he was more worried about Philipa's well being than the hobbits', which meant that she might be seriously injured.

"Well, are we following them or what?" Inez asked.

* * *

**A/N: Hi! So sorry for the long wait.. At first I wasn't inspired to write because I really had no idea what to write but a few days ago I opened the document with the story and I just started writing. This is the result (after a lot of editing - although there may be a few (or a lot) of errors) and I sincerely hope you liked it (: **

**Next chapter.. they meet Gandalf!**

**BTW, if anyone is interested in the literal meaning of Legolas' words - "May they find peace after death"**

**Don't forget, feedback is always appreciated :D**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: I'm sooooo incredibly sorry for the extremely long wait! Believe it or not, I was supposed to update this in the beginning of September but I didn't have my computer (which meant I didn't have the document with the story) and by the time I had it I was full of tests. I know it's a lame excuse and again I'm really sorry. I know I hate it when the stories I read take too long to get an update. I hope not too many of you have stopped reading this because of the long absence of updates.**

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* * *

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Chapter 16

Just before entering the forest Gimli found black liquid on some leaves and tasted it. He quickly spit it out, making the girls laugh at him.

"That tasty, huh?" Marta asked jokingly.

He glared at her. "It's Orc Blood. How was that supposed to be tasty?"

"Sarcasm Gimli, she was messing with you. You should have learned that by now." Inez said.

"Sarcasm. Humph, I'll show you my axe and then I will give you sarcasm." He answered as they made their way through Fangorn Forest.

"If I didn't know you better, I'd say you are getting old Gimli. All that grumpiness.." Marta said. He snorted.

"These are strange tracks." Aragorn said.

"The air is so close in here." Gimli said after him and the girls quickly agreed.

"Yeah, it's actually kinda hard to breathe. You have to breathe in more deeply."

"Yep." Marta nodded.

"This forest is old. Very old. Full of memory, and anger." Legolas said quietly as he looked around.

The trees suddenly.. groaned.

"What the heck?" Inez asked startled. Gimli picked up his axe.

"The trees are speaking to each other." Legolas explained.

"Gimli. Lower your axe." Aragorn said.

"They have feelings dude. You don't want one of those things mad at you, do you?" Marta asked trying to sound superior.

"Indeed. The Elves began it. Waking up the trees, teaching them so speak."

"Yeah right..." Inez muttered.

"Talking trees... what do trees have to talk about? Except the consistency of squirrel droppings."

They kept walking until Legolas stopped abruptly.

"Aragorn! nad no ennas!" He called. ("Something's out there")

"Whataaaaa?" Inez asked confused. "I hate it when you spe-" Aragorn held up one hand to silence her.

"Man cenich?" He asked. ("What do you see?")

"Right, go ahead and speak in Sindarin.. it's not like we don't understand or anything.." Marta complained.

Legolas looked at her oddly but quickly turned to face Aragorn.

"The White Wizard approaches."

"Do not let him speak, he will put a spell on us." Aragorn said as he drew his sword. "Girls, stand beside us. We must be quick."

Inez looked at Marta worriedly. She smiled in return.

"What?" Inez mouthed.

"We must be quick." Aragorn said.

They all turned to attack then. Gimli threw his axe and it was knocked to the side then. _Fail_ Marta thought.

Legolas prepared his bow but it was knocked to the side as well. _Huge fail._

Aragorn's sword suddenly changed its color to orange because of how hot it was and he dropped it. _Massive fail._

Inez was the last one with a weapon drawn (Marta didn't bother to move a muscle) but knowing that she was the only one able to fight and that her sword would soon be on the floor as well she dropped it quickly.

Everyone had to bring their hands to their eyes in order to shield from the bright light that the figure in front of them was emitting.

"You are tracking the footsteps of two young hobbits and a young girl." A voice said gravely.

"Where are they?" Aragorn asked.

"They passed this way, the day before yesterday. They met someone they did not expect. Does that comfort you?"

"The hell it does!" Inez yelled in return.

"Who are you? Show yourself!" Aragorn demanded.

Suddenly the lights around the figure faded and they could finally see them.

Everyone was in awe upon the person standing before them.

"It cannot be." Aragorn said not believing his eyes.

"Forgive me." Legolas apologized as he bowed along with Gimli. "I mistook you for Saruman."

"I am Saruman. Or rather, Saruman as he should have been."

"Wait, didn't he die?" Inez asked at the same time Aragorn talked.

"You fell." He stated.

"Through fire, and water. From the lowest dungeon to the highest peek I fought him, the Balrog of Morgoth." Gandalf explained. He went on telling them the hardships of his journey since the moment he left them.

"... I've been sent back... until my task is done." He ended.

"Gandalf..." Aragorn said moving forwards.

Gandalf's eyebrows rose up. He seemed confused for a moment until he finally understood.

"Gandalf? Yes, that was what they used to call me." He paused. "Gandalf the Grey. That was my name."

"Gandalf." Gimli said.

"I am Gandalf the White, and I come back to you now at the turn of the tide." Gandalf continued. He finally looked at the newest members of the fellowship.

"Ah, yes. I've been informed about you."

"Really?" Marta asked excitedly. Inez kept looking at his beard.

"Yes. You are definitely otherworldly." He said with a gleam in his eyes. The girls giggled understanding what he meant.

"You have no idea. They are mad!" Gimli cut in.

"Yes, so they are. And that may be just what we will need in the end." Gandalf countered making everyone else confused. Some more than others.

They started walking through the forest.

"I like him already." Inez whispered to Marta.

Legolas laughed quietly.

* * *

"One stage of our journey is over. Another begins. We must travel to Edoras with all speed." Gandalf stated.

"Edoras? That is no short distance!" Gimli retorted.

"Wait a second, where's that?" Inez asked but nobody seemed to hear her, or everyone ignored her.

"We hear of trouble in Rohan. It goes ill with the king."

"Yes, and it will not be easily cured." Gandalf replied.

"Wait, so the guys we met were from Rouan?" Inez asked.

"RO-HAN." Marta explained. "But yeah."

"Then, we have run all this way for nothing? Are we to leave those poor Hobbits -" Gimli started.

"And Philipa." Marta interrupted.

"- and Philipa here... in this horrid, dark, dank tree-infested - " At that the trees started groaning again. "- I mean, charming... quite charming forest." He forced a smile.

Inez and Marta chuckled.

"It was more than mere chance that brought them to Fangorn. A great power has been sleeping here for many long years. The coming of them will be like the falling of small stones... that starts an avalanche in the mountains." Gandalf replied.

"What the.."

Aragorn approached Gandalf and he leaned on him. "In one thing you have not changed, dear friend. You still speak in riddles."

Everyone laughed.

"Tell me about it, I didn't understand half of what he just said." Inez said.

"A thing is about to happen that has not happened since the Elder Days. The Ents are going to wake up... and find that they are strong."

"Ents?" Inez asked.

"They're somewhat humanoid trees." Marta clarified. Rather.. tried to clarify, Inez only seemed more confused.

Gimli however seemed confused about another thing.

"Strong?" The trees groaned yet again. He noticed it. "Oh, that's good."

"So stop your fretting, Master Dwarf. Merry, Pippin and Philipa are quite safe. In fact, they are far safer than you are about to be." Gandalf told him.

"Great!" Marta and Inez said simultaneously faking joy.

Gimli was about to reply but he seemed to finally understand the concept of 'sarcasm'.

"Aw, I feel like a proud mamma. Gimli finally understands us!" Marta said clapping her hands together.

Gandalf looked at the two girls with interest.

"You will get used to them soon." Aragorn said.

"And you will get tired of them even sooner." Gimli added.

"Yeah right, you know you love us." Inez went for a hug but Gimli shrugged her off quickly.

As she looked at Inez, Marta noticed the slightly dark spot on her trousers.

"Hum... Inez?"

"Yeah?" Inez asked distractedly.

"I need to tell you something."

"What is it?"

"I think you'd prefer it if I told you and only you."

Everyone else looked at them curiously.

"Oh come on, it's not like we can keep any secrets from them anyway."

"Alright.. I think you've got your period." Marta explained as quickly as she could.

The men - figuratively speaking - from the fellowship tried to find something else to do.

"Oh."

* * *

"There's no way in hell I'm going to use that." Inez whined looking at the pieces of cloth Marta was holding. They were 'hidden' behind some bushes as far away from the fellowship as they could.

"It's either this or nothing."

"But it's so... ew!" Inez complained.

Marta's response was to shove the piece of cloth into her hands and to walk away leaving her alone looking at the thing as if it would eat her at any moment.

* * *

"Hey, Gandalf?" Marta called later at night after they had dined.

"Yes, Marta."

"How was Philipa when you saw her?"

Gandalf seemed thoughtful for a moment and then he answered.

"She was considerably well, if you forget the minor bruises here and there. She had one bigger wound but I'm certain Treebeard has taken care of it."

"That's good." Aragorn voiced.

"Very good indeed."

"How are you feeling Inez?" Aragorn asked.

Inez looked at him.

"Uncomfortable."

"I feel bad for you. Wait... no, I don't." Marta grinned.

* * *

**A/N: So.. what did you think? I'm not really into this chapter because I feel like I leaned too much on the movie as I was writing it. I wasn't sure whether to write the last part or not but every time I read stories like this one I always wonder what it would be like if you really got your period (which was bound to happen since you were obviously going to be in ME for more than one month). No one ever writes about it.**

**Alright, I'm writing the next chapter right now and I hope that I post it here by the end of the week.**

**Don't forget to leave your review!  
**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: after the chapter**

* * *

**Chapter 17 - Extreme Makeover**

The following night..

"Gandalf, I have a question for you." Inez broke the silence. They had just finished their dinner and were resting around a camp fire. Everyone seemed to be thinking about something.

"Do you?" He smiled at her encouragingly.

"That can't be good." Gimli muttered.

Legolas looked at Inez curiously.

"Doesn't the length of your beard bother you? Like when you're eating soup?"

Marta went into a fit of coughs trying not to laugh.

"It's not funny! I've always wondered about this... especially with Dumbledore from Harry Potter since his beard is longer." Inez rambled on.

Everyone seemed to be looking at Gandalf waiting for his next move, whatever it was. Gimli was muttering something about Inez' lack of manners and Legolas asked who Dumbledore was.

Aragorn shook his head at Inez' behavior.

Suddenly, Gandalf started laughing much to the others' surprise.

"You really are two peculiar girls." He said once he calmed down.

"Well, peculiar is our middle name." Marta replied grinning.

"It is?" Legolas asked. Aragorn raised one eyebrow.

"Yes." She looked at his expression to see if he bought it. He did. "Of course not!"

"Child, you should know better than to fool others." Gandalf intervened.

"Well, I wasn't fooling anyone. It's not my fault that Legolas doesn't understand when one is joking."

Aragorn rolled his eyes.

"Aragorn, did you just roll your eyes?" Marta asked him smiling.

He clenched his teeth. "No."

"You did! Oh I feel like a proud mamma! First Gimli, now you! Inez, our babies have grown up!" She hugged him much to his dismay but let go of him right away. "Uh, you smell!"

"He's not the only one." Gimli added. Legolas chuckled.

Marta glared at them. "Of course not, Gimli. You smell as well. As for you Legolas.. you..." She tried to find a flaw in his figure. "..you... have one lock of your hair out of place. Ha!" She pointed at his hair victoriously.

Meanwhile, Inez was still pouting about the fact that no one had taken her question seriously.

"Hey, no one answered my question."

* * *

After a few days of traveling they were almost in Edoras.

"My butt hurts so much I swear I won't be able to walk for the next few days." Inez complained from the horse she was sharing with Legolas.

"I second that."

"That seems to be the only thing you're good at." Gimli retorted.

"What?" The girls asked.

"Complaining."

Everyone but the girls laughed.

"Yeah right. As if I don't hear you every single night complaining when you think that everyone else is asleep." Inez replied.

"But-" Gimli started.

"Indeed! I hear him as well. 'Tis quite tiring to be honest, hearing him rambling on and on about how he is tired of the elf food and that his legs hurt from running all day.." Legolas agreed.

"You..you.. ELF!" Gimli said angrily from his own horse, as if the word ELF was an extremely offensive word.

Legolas chuckled.

"Believe it or not but one day you two will be great friends." Marta said grinning.

Gimli snorted and Legolas raised his eyebrows.

"Are you telling the truth or fooling us again?" Legolas asked.

"I'm dead serious." Marta replied trying to keep a straight face. Aragorn chuckled lightly in front of her.

Gimli cocked his head to the side. "Dead?"

Marta and Inez smacked their foreheads on Aragorn and Legolas' backs, respectively.

"Hey, isn't that Edoras?" Marta asked looking ahead of them. It was still far away but close enough for them to notice it. After all, it was a small town in the middle of nowhere.. it wasn't that hard to miss.

Legolas nodded. They stopped their horses to contemplate the village in front of them.

"Edoras and the Golden Hall of Meduseld. There dwells Theoden, King of Rohan... whose mind is overthrown. Saruman's hold over King Theoden is now very strong." Gandalf spoke up after being silent for practically the whole day.

"Right." Inez nodded confusedly. "Y'know, being thrown into this place knowing close to nothing about it is not really that great.." She muttered.

"I told you to pay attention to the movies, but no! Nobody listens to me." Marta protested.

Inez stuck her tongue out at Marta.

"Idiot."

"Stupid."

"Mo-"

"Enough! You two are the most irritating people I have ever known in my life." Aragorn declared.

"Even more so than Elladan and Elrohir?" Marta questioned. Gandalf chuckled - was that the only thing that the old man/wizard ever did?

Aragorn was thoughtful for a moment.

"Who?" Inez asked.

"Possibly." Aragorn finally answered.

Marta smiled. "Possibly. That means that you're not sure!"

Aragorn grimaced.

"Who are Eldan and Eldir?" Inez asked.

"Elladan and Elrohir." Legolas corrected.

"Huh?"

"Elladan and Elrohir. Those are their names."

"Ah." Everyone was silent. "So, who are they?"

"They are two of Lord Elrond's children." Aragorn explained with a trace of sadness in his voice.

"Lord who?" Inez asked.

Everyone else looked at her in disbelief.

"We will explain that later." Aragorn said.

They were just outside Edoras.

"Be careful what you say. Do not look for welcome here." Gandalf said. He looked at the two girls to make sure they understood.

As they rode into the town a standard fluttered to the ground right next to Aragorn and Marta's horse. She shuddered.

Everyone seemed to stop what they were doing to stare at them.

"You'll find more cheer in a graveyard." Gimli said. Inez nodded and looked at Gandalf. Somehow he had changed his clothing. Just a few minutes before he had been wearing white and now he was covered with a grey cloak.

"Hey, when did Gandalf change his clothing?"

* * *

Once they got out of their horses they walked up the steps to the Hall.

"What are we doing here?" Inez whispered to Marta.

"You'll find out soon enough." She replied.

"Damn it, two days with Gandalf and you're already speaking in riddles like him."

Marta rolled her eyes.

A few guards walked out of the Hall and approached them.

"I cannot allow you before Theoden King so armed, Gandalf Greyhame. By order of Grima Wormtongue."

"Wormtongue? What kind of name is that?" Inez joked. Gandalf gave her a pointed look and motioned for the others to hand over their weapons.

"Your staff." The same guard said to Gandalf.

"You would not part an old man from his walking stick." Gandalf replied. Inez raised one eyebrow. _Yeah right.. only a fool would fall for that._

The guard looked worried for a moment but quickly made up his mind as he turned around and lead the group inside the Main Hall. Gandalf winked at Aragorn and held onto Legolas' arm as he stepped inside. Everyone else followed him.

Once they were in they saw Theoden sitting with Grima Wormtongue beside him.

Inez shuddered at their appearance. They looked like zombies. "Are you sure that old man's a king?" She whispered to Marta. Marta rolled her eyes for the second time in less than five minutes. "Shut up."

Grima whispered something into Theoden's ear.

"That's not polite." Inez muttered.

"The courtesy of your hall is somewhat lessened of late.. Theoden King."

They kept walking forward... apparently way too forward because they soon were followed by some angry looking guards.

"Why should I welcome you.. Gandalf Stormcrow?" Theoden asked.

"A just question, my liege." Grima said and walked towards Gandalf. Marta could smell his breath from the place she was standing - it was no lovely smell. "Late is the hour... in which this conjurer chooses to appear. Lathspell I name him. Ill news is an ill guest."

The guards moved closer to the group.

"Be silent." Gandalf ordered. "Keep your forked tongue behind your teeth."

"Yes please." Marta muttered wrinkling her nose.

"I have not passed through fire and death.. to bandy crooked words with a witless worm." Gandalf continued and lifted his staff in front of Grima's face. He seemed shocked.

"His staff. I told you to take the wizard's staff!"

Suddenly the group of guards moved to attack Gandalf. Inez and Marta stood still as they watched Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli fighting them off. The scene in front of them seemed to be taken from a movie.. - well, it was from a movie..

"Are we supposed to do something?" Inez asked Marta. Marta shrugged her shoulders carelessly.

"Nah, I don't think so. We would just be making things worse."

Even though there was a fight going on Gandalf kept walking towards Theoden.

"Theoden.. son of Thengel.. too long have you sat in the Shadows." Gandalf said.

Grima attempted to get away only to fail. Gimli stopped him.

"I would stay still if I were you." He warned.

"Hearken to me! I release you.. from the spell." Gandalf held up his hand and closed his eyes in concentration.

Instead of 'being released from the spell' Theoden started laughing mockingly at Gandalf's attempt.

"Is he mad?" Inez asked.

"You have no power here.. Gandalf the Grey." Theoden declared.

"Wait, wasn't he Gandalf the White?" Inez asked Marta.

Marta held one hand up. "Wait for it.. Now."

Gandalf threw off his grey cloak, emitting a bright white light.

"Ah! So that's why he changed his clothes.." Inez realized. "Well.. but it doesn't change the fact that he threw on that cloak all of a sudden.." She mumbled the last part. Marta ignored her.

Theoden was surprised by Gandalf's new appearance. He no longer was Gandalf the Grey for he was dressed in white.

"I will draw you, Saruman, as poison is drawn from a wound." Gandalf thrust his staff forward and just as he did so Theoden was thrown back on his chair.

"You need to give me one of those for Christmas." Inez whispered to Marta pointing at Gandalf's staff.

The king's niece, Éowyn, rushed towards his side but Aragorn stopped her.

"If I go, Theoden dies." Theoden's body - but Saruman's voice - said.

"You did not kill me.. you will not kill him." Gandalf was determined.

"Go Gandalf, Go Gandalf.." Marta cheered earning a few glares from the guards close by. Legolas gave her a pointed look.

When she looked back at the show going on Theoden was being thrown backwards and Éowyn was preventing him from falling.

His face slowly started changing back to himself.

"Wow, talk about an extreme makeover." Inez muttered.

* * *

After he was given his sword, Theoden realized how much of a traitor Grima was and decided to banish him from Rohan.

As he was thrown off the Hall, Grima fell down the stairs. Inez and Marta laughed at the sight.

Theoden walked down the stairs after Grima as he tried to explain his actions and avoid any punishment.

"Wormtongue.. now I understand what the name stands for." Inez countered as he went on and on trying to convince the King.

"Yes, it seems to suit him very well." Legolas agreed.

Theoden raised his sword above Grima's head, he intended to kill him. He probably would have if Aragorn had not rushed to his side and stopped him.

"No, my lord! Let him go. Enough blood has been spilt on his account."

Theoden retreated his sword and Aragorn offered Grima one hand to help him up.

Instead of accepting it Grima spit on his hand.

"Holy crap! Did he just-" Inez started.

"Yep, he did." Marta finished for her.

"Hail, Theoden King!" The guard who had taken their weapons earlier called.

Everyone in the city knelt - including their friends.

"Are we supposed to kneel too?" Inez asked just when Marta pushed her down to do so.

"Where is Theodred? Where is my son?" Theoden asked. Everyone remained silent for the time being.

"Well, where is he?" Inez asked Marta and Gimli.

"Dead."

"Oh, that's not good, is it?"

"No, not really."

* * *

After Theoden found out of his son death he declared they would bury him later on that afternoon.

Once they were inside Éowyn approached the girls.

"Come with me, I will lead you to one of our spare rooms. I understand you prefer to stay together." She smiled warmly at the two girls. They nodded.

"Rooms? As in.. bedrooms?" Inez asked with a gleam in her eyes.

"Yes." Éowyn answered confusedly.

The girls hugged her slightly.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou! You are an angel." Marta said.

Éowyn chuckled. "Has it been that long since you slept on a bed?"

"Trust me, YES." They couldn't remember the last time they slept somewhere that wasn't.. well,.. the floor. Just then Marta seemed to finally notice how nice Éowyn smelt.. or how bad SHE smelt.

"Don't worry, I have sent our maids to fetch you girls a warm bath in your quarters."

Inez sighed happily. "I feel like I'm in heaven."

* * *

"Inez, just hurry up already!" Marta yelled from the floor of their bedroom. She didn't want to ruin her bed with her dirty clothes. They only had one bathroom - meaning only one bath tub - and Inez had been taking the longest bath ever - 1hour and 32 minutes to be precise.

"Just a few more minutes!" Inez responded.

There was a knock on the door.

"Yeah?"

"Are you ready?" Gimli's voice asked from the other side of the door.

Marta's eyes widened. "No!...why?"

"King Theoden's son burial will begin in a quarter of an hour." Legolas clarified.

Marta opened the door. They were still wearing their dirty clothes.

"FIFTEEN MINUTES?.. INEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ!"

* * *

Ten minutes later one washed up Inez and a smelly Marta showed up at the main city where everyone was gathered waiting for the beginning of the ceremony.

"What's wrong?" Legolas and Gimli approached them and noticed Marta frowning.

"Oh nothing, just the fact that the idiot standing next to me took one hour and a half to take one bloody shower and now I smell as if I just dove into a pool of poop while she's all clean up and pretty, smelling like roses!" She rose her voice as she kept talking, earning a few stares from the people around them.

"Crybaby." Inez mumbled.

"If it makes you feel better, we haven't showered either." Legolas offered.

"I can tell." Marta said back. The elf furrowed his eyebrows and Gimli stifled a laugh.

Aragorn joined them then.

"Inez, you look.." He seemed thoughtful for a while. "… clean!"

Marta's scowl deepened.

"Why Aragorn, thank you." Inez pretended to bow.

Aragorn glanced at Marta - still in her travel clothes.

"Don't." Marta snapped before he said anything.

Everyone seemed to be quiet then. The burial ceremony was beginning.

They made way so that Theoden and the six royal guards who carried Theodred could pass. Then they followed them to the burial mounds. The fellowship followed them and behind them so did the people of Edoras.

"I feel like I'm going to start laughing at any moment now." Inez whispered to Marta as they walked.

"You're so immature. This is serious." Marta shook her head.

"I know but.. I don't know, maybe -"

"Be quiet." Aragorn shushed them.

When they arrived at his tomb Eowyn was already there with the other women. She started singing as his body was placed inside the tomb.

Inez was hiding her face between her hands. It was hard to tell whether she was crying or laughing.

"Lass, are you crying?" Gimli asked and put one hand over her shoulder. She seemed to be shaking. She nodded. Surprisingly, he felt bad for her.

She uncovered her face enough so that he could see that she wasn't crying after all. Well, actually she was crying.. She was covering her laughs.

Gimli couldn't believe his eyes. Laughing! During a burial ceremony! LAUGHING! No manners, this girl had no manners.

She tried to explain herself.

"I don't think this is funny, I really don't! But for some reason I can't stop laughing. You know sometimes you laugh even when you don't want to? Well, this is one of those times!"

Marta, however, was trying to keep her tears - real tears - from falling. Eowyn singing was heart wrenching. Even though she had no idea what she was saying she could feel her sadness upon her brother's death. Theoden seemed as if he would break at any moment. So much sorrow and sadness gathered in one place.. it was contagious.

* * *

"That was almost as tiring as running for 10 hours straight." Marta said once she and Inez entered their bedroom.

"You're joking right?" She saw that Marta wasn't nodding. "Why would you think that?"

"Did you see how much this town is hurting? I feel as if I'm breathing sadness, you know?"

"You've always been so emotional…" Inez rolled her eyes.

"You sound like a heartless bitch." Marta retorted.

"What? Don't say that, I understand what you're saying and I totally get that they are grieving but.. I never got to know this Theoden person so there is really no point in me being grieving over his death."

Marta walked towards the bathroom. "It's Theodred, not Theoden." She said before closing the bathroom door after her**. **_Damn it.. Philipa where the hell are you? _She sighed.**  
**

* * *

**A/N: So.. obviously I didn't update one week after the last chapter and I feel like shit for it. sorryyyyyyyyyyy**

**I hope you enjoyed the LONG chapter, I thought that I might as well update with a long one to make up for the lack of updates lately :D**

**Don't take Inez' behavior as if she's a heartless person. Her personality is just different from Marta's and she's not really an emotional person.  
**

**Don't forget, Feedback is always appreciated ;P**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Oh my god! I updated! Alright, in September I had written a bit of chapter 18 but then I spilled milk over my laptop - please don't EVER do that. Basically, it was ruined and I had to buy a new one, but (gasp) only yesterday did I recover all the things from the old computer (i.e. the document with the story). This is REALLY INCREDIBLY AWFULLY short but I was feeling so bad about not updating that I just had to upload the little I had - call it a very tiny christmas present (to those of you who still read this). So, yeah.. MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!**

* * *

**Chapter 18 - Wait, so in Middle Earth hair grows too?  
**

As Inez was laying down on her bed enjoying the comfort she had lacked for the past few weeks she heard a scream coming from the bathroom.

"What happened?" She rushed to the bathroom door.

"_MY LEGS! I LOOK LIKE A FREAKING MONKEY!"_ Marta's reply came from the other side.

"Tell me about it.. What should we do?"

"_HOW SHOULD I KNOW? I JUST KNOW THAT I AIN'T GONNA STAY LIKE THIS! JUST GO GET SOMEONE AND TELL THEM ABOUT OUR PROBLEM!"_

"Oh alright, I'll just go get Legolas and ask him if he's got any razors around." Inez retorted sarcastically.

"..._and hurry up!"_

"So much for my afternoon nap." Inez muttered as she left the room.

* * *

"Inez!" Someone called behind her. She turned around and found herself face to face with Gimli. Well, not exactly face to face since he was a dwarf and all that.

"Oh hey Gimli, what's up?"

He looked up at the ceiling. "Foolish question! Surely you know what that is."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah yeah, whatever. Do you know where can I find a maid?"

"Well lass, one just walked by me and moved in that direction. If you walk twice as fast as you normally do - or maybe slightly faster than that - you may be able to find her."

"Was that an insult?"

"Wasn't it quite obvious?"

She glared at him and then took off after the maid.

* * *

"Excuse me.." Even though she was panting and cursing every two seconds, Inez had managed to find the maid - much to her own surprise.

"Yes, my lady? Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Actually, yes.." She hadn't even told her what her problem was and she was already feeling embarrassed for herself. "I was wondering if you have any.. hum.. you know.. razors around?"

"Certainly." The maid smiled kindly. "If I may ask, what would you be needing those razors for?"

Inez blushed. "Oh, they're not for me!" She chuckled nervously. "They're for my friend, she needs them to... to shave her legs."

"Oh, I understand! You may go to your quarters now, my lady. I will go there once I have them."

"Thank you so much!" She turned around and Aragorn was walking towards her.

"Inez, what are you doing here?" Aragorn asked. The maid left them quickly.

"Nothing."

"You were talking to the maid."

"So?"

"What were you talking about? Is it anything I can help you with?"

"Why are you being so nosy? It's none of your business!" She snapped and started walking quickly to avoid any further questioning.

* * *

"Stop smelling your hair!" Inez told Marta as they walked to the dining hall. Marta had been smelling her hair ever since she had gotten out of the bathroom.

"Sorry, it's just that it smells so good!" She took another sniff of her hair.

"I'm starting to agree with everyone else, there's something seriously wrong with you."

"Whatever. At least I'm not the one who has cuts all over her legs because she doesn't know how to shave."

"Shut up, the blade was too sharp for me."

"Yeah right."


End file.
